Secrets
by Lady Orion101
Summary: All human, with a brand new twist on the Alice-Jasper relationship. Jasper has secrets he won’t share and it’s up to Alice to try and figure him out. Meanwhile Alice is finding she has secrets of her own she’d rather not tell either...
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: **

**So about a year ago I had never really entertained the idea that I could write a story of any kind. I was never the English nerd and anyone whose gone through highschool knows the joys of having your essays trashed by teachers. Then stupid Twilight came and took over my life and now I'm finding I can't stop writing about it. (Admit it, Twilight has taken over your life too and you know you should be doing homework right now instead of looking up fanfics. Don't try to deny it...) Also, please excuse any not smrt grammar and spelling errors I may have missed in my editing. **

**I should also mention that this story is officially dedicated to two my friends - one, introducing me to the Twilight series in the first place and for deciding that I was the real life Alice (I'm psychic. Honest ^^) and making me want to write more about her character. The other for still talking to me even after deciding I was seriously crazy (but we all know that she's a closet Twilight fan and loves it just as much as I do...) **

**Hopefully neither of them will trash me too much in their reviews. xD Oh and please, R&R guys, everyone here who writes knows it's the best part of the writing experience: FEEDBACK! Much love and do enjoy reading my story.**_** I**_** had fun at least...**

**Chapter 1:**

Usually I don't have a problem with Mondays. Today however was an exception. I ran a hand through my hair a little nervously. Black hair that was streaked in bright purple on one side. It had been my last highschool's team colour so I had decided to show some team spirit by adding it to my daily appearance. It was jazzy and funky and got me some of the weirdest looks which made me laugh. Actually a lot of things make me laugh. I was a naturally high energy, happy minded person. I was still able to be sensitive to people's moods but at the same time always managed to find a way to stay upbeat.

Or at least I had back home. I was starting to have serious doubts about whether or not I could keep up that kind of attitude here. 'Here' being Forks, my brand new home. Well, 'home' in the loosest possible meaning of the word. It was where I now lived, but I didn't know the area at all, I recognized no one outside my family and I everything and everyone I knew and loved was now what felt like thousands of miles away back in Vancouver.

Why we just _had _to move I had no idea. At least it wasn't really that far away from my previous home, just south a little, but the dividing border line made it feel like so much further. At least the new house was nice. Kind of huge and I even had my own bathroom. For anyone whose ever had to share a bathroom with a brother before, you will know how nice a change that is. I hadn't wasted a single day in getting my room organized and arranged either. Edward commented that my room always looked like an Ikea catalogue page with a gothic twist. I liked everything to match in a weird sort of way, but I always tried to put an creative edge on everyday features.

Our adoptive parents had insisted it was going to be a great experience for us all... When I say 'our' I mean my brother Edward and I's. We're twins, though not identical so most people don't believe us when we say we are.

We looked completely different and see life from completely different perspectives, but still we're still connected in that weird way all twins are. We can always tell what the other is thinking like we were psychic or able to read minds or something. Edward's always been there for me no matter what and I couldn't think of anyone I had ever been closer too. He could be ridiculously overprotective on occasion as some of my past boyfriends had found out. I hadn't taken most of my past relationships very seriously so I never really minded. Besides, I was sure he would mind his own business if I really wanted him to.

I fluffed my hair out again, rearranging the bits that fell in my face in the car mirror. Edward was driving both of us to our first day at our new highschool. We were both juniors so hopefully he would be in a couple of my classes.

'Stop fidgeting already Alice, you look fine,' my brother assured me as he turned into the school's parking lot. 'I don't know what you're so worried about anyway. You know no one can resist getting swept up into your plotting and scheming,' he teased me as he found an empty spot and pulled in. He switched off the engine, but we both just sat there for a moment or two watching students walking by towards the school buildings, both contemplating our coming day.

'Come on, squirt,' Edward grinned over at me, 'Let's do this.' My nickname from him was squirt because I was so tiny. I had always been skinny due to a kick ass genetically gifted metabolism but I wasn't really _that_ short - I was nearly an inch or so over 5 feet. I didn't think it was fair that he got to be the tall one. It was a constant source of jokes for him. I stuck my tongue out at him, pulling together my confidence. I reached for car door handle.

'Race ya?' I suggested innocently nodding towards the building labelled 'Office' across the lot. 'You're on. First one to get their schedule?' he suggested. I nodded and then bolted, ignoring him yelling that I had started before he had called time. I may have looked like I was a crazy psycho tearing across the parking lot like I was being pursued by a pack of wolves but at least I was going to go down in style.

Giggling like crazy I grabbed the office door and yanked it open, Edward at least half a dozen steps behind me. I flung myself across the tiny waiting room to the front desk and introduced myself in a rush to a startle looking middle aged woman with red hair. She looked at me with wide eyes, as if I were about to turn green or something before stumbling slightly over welcoming me to the school and proceeding to get me my schedule.

It turned out Edward was in my Calculus and History classes. He was not however in my very first period class, so I set off alone to find the room while he went to his Biology class. I paused at the classroom door to psych myself up a little and then walked in as confidently as possible. The room was only half filled with chatting students so there were plenty of desk options available at least.

I walked slowly to give myself time to find someone who looked nice to sit next to. Everyone seemed to know everyone else though, making me feel more and more left out. I nearly settled for the back corner of the back row when a blond boy with a wide grin stopped me at the second row.

'Hey, uh you're the new girl right?' he asked. I blushed. How the heck did they even know already? 'Word travels fast,' I commented, then smiled back, not meaning to seem rude.

'Well small town, any news spreads like wild fire. Just something you get used to,' he shrugged still grinning, 'I'm Mike by the way.'

'Hi! I'm Alice. Alice Cullen.' Just then a brown haired girl wearing a pink hoodie leaned over the desk just behind Mike's.

'Is this the new girl?' she demanded. Mike turned to speak to her. 'Yeah. Alice, this is Jessica.' 'You can call me Jess,' the girl added, bouncing in her chair so she was facing me. 'Oh my gosh this is so cool. You come from Vancouver right? What's it like? I bet your last school was like, way bigger than this. And probably more interesting. Forks is like, the boringest place ever. But tell me about the student council at your Vancouver school, I totally bet it let the students do much cooler stuff than ours does. Maybe you can talk to ours and bring in some new ideas...'

She talked on and on until the teacher called everyone's attention up to the front of the room. I turned away with a small smile. Jess was nice enough but seemed like a headache just waiting to happen. Mike turned to grin at me every so often and passed me a note commenting on how boring the lecture was. I didn't write an answer back, only smiled and silently rolled my eyes in agreement, not exactly wanting to encourage him.

Class finally ended, releasing me from Jess's endless questions and Mike's constant attention. Next was History with Edward thankfully. I met him at the door and immediately set about interrogating him about his first class, probably sounding as bad as Jess. Then I left for my own Biology class, and Edward for Chemistry.

Bio dragged on the same as it had back home, which was vaguely comforting that something at least was staying the same. Lunch time arrived and I remembered I had received an invitation to sit with Mike and his friends. I wandered into the caf and scanned around for a familiar face. The cafeteria was pretty full by now though and I couldn't find anyone I knew in the crowd. I walked past a couple tables where I received a couple of strange looks, probably because of my hair. One girl with long wavy blond hair raised an eyebrow and then snickered without even looking away.

Biting my lip I decided I may have to reconsider my hair style while I was here and maybe dye the purple streaks over. I cursed my lack of height as I craned to see above the swarm of students to find someone, anyone I recognized. _Damn it, where was Edward already? He said he would be here!_ Finally I spotted his distinctive bronze hair by the caf doors. I skipped over and sneak attacked him, surprising him with hug.

'Whoa! Hey there bombshell. How'd your morning go?' He laughed and hugged me back.

'Meh. Could have been worse I suppose,' I shrugged, dragging him over to the food line up, 'How was the rest of yours?'

'Um...interesting,' he said casually. 'Interesting?' I repeated, 'That's a loaded statement if ever there was one. What happened?'

He grimaced and ran a hand through his hair. 'I was kind of stalked during my chemistry class?' I started laughing. My poor brother often had this effect on girls, as I had long observed.

'Well you _are_ rather good looking I suppose. If you kind of squint and ignore your personality.' He reached over to poke me which I dodged and demanded more details from him as we carried our food out to find a table. 'Well this one blond girl, she followed me around the class from the minute I walked in. Honestly I am not kidding. Even during our lab, she followed my every foot step. It was like having an obsessive puppy or something. I nearly tripped over her half the time.

'Oh but then in bio...' he trailed off, smirking to himself. 'Okay what happened?' I insisted grabbing his arm, 'Tell, tell, tell!' He was saved by Mike jumping up and rushing over to me. 'Hey Alice! Want to come sit with us?' Mike paused for a moment to eye Edward curiously and maybe a little defensively.

'Sure, thanks! Oh, um this is my brother Edward. Edward, this is Mike. He's in a couple of my classes.' They both exchanged a chilly 'hey' before Mike regained his enthusiasm and led us over to a table. Jess was there as well as several others.

The blond girl who had sneered at my purple hair a few minutes earlier also showed up carrying her lunch tray. 'Hey Jess,' she said brightly, all her former animosity magically gone, 'Mind if I sit with you today?' And I wonder what brought _this _on... I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. She introduced herself as Lauren and was looking significantly at Edward but luckily the only free spot left was between Mike and a boy called Eric. She didn't seem very pleased with this option but seeing as it was her only one, she took it.

Jess kept up the interview all through lunch hour. 'So you guys are really twins?' she asked, a look of astonishment on her face. 'Yup.' 'You don't look it.' 'Nope.'

I barely answered her questions, I was much more interested in listening to my brother right then. Angela and a quiet girl named Bella how sat next to her seemed to have claimed Edward's attention. Although by the looks of things, it was more Bella than Angela that he was focussed on. This seemed fine by Angela - she was the only girl who seemed unaffected by his presence. She seemed to be trying to help Bella along in their conversation whenever the mahogany haired girl got shy. I smile quietly. Bella was going to be my next subject of interrogation driving home for sure...


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: **

I said goodbye to everyone at the end of lunch although half the people at the table turned up in my afternoon classes anyway. Small school life. Angela was in my French class and we worked together on an in-class group assignment. She and Bella were probably the nicest people I had met yet. She didn't pry or grill and even told me about herself without embellishing anything, which was a nice change.

My last class of the day was Art. It had always been my favourite back home and I hoped that trend would continue here. The art classroom was typical. A large room with wide slanted drawing desks in rows and masterpiece posters all over the walls. One wall was all windows that looked out into the soggy green forest that threatened to swallow parts of campus. Mike was there too. What a surprise.

He waved me over to sit next to him. I did so reluctantly. There were only so many hours in a single day I could put up with him. I smiled warmly and waved back. I sat down, spreading out my stuff and asking what the class was currently working on. I wasn't worried about catching up - this was the one subject I could truly zone out and work in. I always finished pretty much every one of my assignments a week early in this class anyway.

A few minutes later and I was extremely glad I had decided to sit next to Mike. Because the occupant of desk on my other side turned out to be absolutely the most gorgeous boy I had ever seen. I thought that I was going to have an empty desk next to me the whole semester when all of a sudden I looked up and there he was. I couldn't help but stare at him until he looked back at me. I was about to try and say something coherent when the teacher started talking and I settled for a smile instead. I got half a nod and a brief smile in return.

I faced the front and pretended to listen but couldn't help peeking at him out of the corner of my eye. I hadn't even known he existed a minute ago and now I was gaping at him in rapidly on-setting obsession. He was as tall as Edward at least, lean and well built. He had ruffled honey blonde hair with a few darker hi-lights hidden in it and his eyes were a strange light blue green mix that looked like they were covered in ice crystals.

Finally the teacher stopped talking and everyone got up to retrieve their current work off the storage shelves. The class was working on pastel drawing, either colour or black and white. Some people were doing still life studies from photos, other landscapes. Unconsciously I pulled the green and blue pastels from my box first, twirling one in my fingers as I tried to think up a good subject.

I glanced over at Jasper then couldn't help but be impressed by his own drawing. It was of a pair of black ravens flying against a white background, but in some areas the bird's feathers threw an iridescent shimmer which he had drawn in colour. He caught me staring and drew his hand away from the paper to give me a full view.

'Do you like it?' he asked sounding a little amused.

'Like it? I love it. It's beautiful! Even better yet, it's given me an idea for my drawing.'

'And what's that?'

'You'll just have to wait and see!' I teased, 'I'm Alice by the way. New girl,' I added for his benefit.

'I had heard a rumour. I'm Jasper. Jasper Hale. Are...you enjoying Forks so far?' He sounded a little awkward in his question, probably because he could see Mike sitting right behind me, listening to every word we said. Jasper must have understood I couldn't exactly speak my mind about Forks without someone over hearing. And we both knew Forks was just about the least exciting place anywhere.

'Absolutely,' I grinned. At least that wouldn't hurt Mike's feelings or anyone else who actually came from Forks. For some reason I got the impression that Jasper wasn't from around here either. Just the way he looked, the way he seemed to be a bit of an outsider too. Maybe we shared some common ground in that aspect. Had he wanted to come here? Was there somewhere he missed right now just as much as I missed my old home too? I never got a chance to ask him though.

For one, it felt kind of strange to ask something so personal to someone I had met barely a minute ago and two, because Mike seemed to think now was an appropriate time to break up our conversation. I got the impression he didn't like Jasper very much because when he asked me to give my opinion on something about his own drawing, he took the time to shoot a glare at the other blond boy. Competition got? I wondered, trying not to giggle. Mike's drawing was kind of terrible but I tried to be as constructive as possible.

When I turned back, Jasper had his headphones on - he was like me in that he didn't like to be disturbed while he worked. I decided to follow his example. I set the song to something happy and dance-able to, then got to work. My design idea was a peacock, with bright blue and green plumage on black paper. It fit my mind - colourful and crazy.

My music was infectious though and I couldn't resist moving along to it as I drew. I saw Mike give me a strange look now and again probably wondering if I was high or something. I was still working even when the bell rang, releasing everybody for the end of the day.

Mike was ready to leave after 10 seconds. Jasper however, like me, was still focussed. People were talking and gathering their stuff. With all the background noise I didn't feel self conscious at all to randomly start singing along to whatever random song was currently playing on my iPod.

'Keep it cool, what's the name of this club? I can't remember but it's alright, a-alright...Just dance, gonna be okay, da da doo-doo-mmm Just dance, spin that record babe -' I broke off when I saw Mike staring at me like I was nuts. I was slightly offended. I knew my voice wasn't half bad and I could pull off a dance move or two.

'What?' I demanded, 'You don't burst out into random dance parties yourself?' Mike looked nervous. 'Um, no?' 'Geez, boring, give them a try some time. I highly recommend it.' I heard Jasper laugh behind me. 'See, he thought I was good,' I protested jokingly to Mike.

'Definitely,' Jasper agreed, 'You'll replace Britney Spears in the near future.' I burst out laughing.

'Why thank you! You can be my back up.'

Mike's glare was scalding, but Jasper ignored him entirely. 'Keep me posted for the school talent show. I bet you're fabulous when you have a real audience,' Jasper said as he picked up his jacket and bag. I struck a pose and pretended to lift a pair of imaginary sunglasses. Jasper grinned and said goodbye.

'See you tomorrow!' I called then burst into random giggles as soon as he was out the door. Mike was still waiting for me, and now most likely concerned about my mental health. Oh well. His loss if he couldn't appreciate true craziness - it was so rare to come by in people these days, everyone was so obsessed with being cool they forgot to be a freak on occasion.

I was as hyper as ever on the drive home. Edward claimed he was going to ask Mike to monitor my daily sugar intake levels if this kept up which earned him a poke that made him swerve the car across the road. Luckily it was deserted - good old quiet town back roads.

'So you seem pretty pleased with the school.' 'Absolutely. Everyone was really nice and I scared a bunch of people already-' 'Why am I not surprised...' '-and there's so much potential for converting people to the wild side of life. They're all so tame and normal, I can't wait to start make overs!'

'Remember to breathe Alice.'

'Yeah, yeah sure, oxygen who needs it. So who should I start with?'

'Take it slow, I'm not sure how resistant these small town people will be to change.' 'Not like that's going to stop me. I need to throw a music dance party - And then invite Mike.' I burst into giggles just thinking about that possibility. Edward didn't even ask. He knew from experience sometimes it was better not to...

* *

The next few days passed much the same as the others; my classes were in the same order, I hung out with the same lunch crew. Bella especially was fun to talk too. She was quiet but she was the most observant and made funny comments about things no one else noticed. Jess was lively company though I couldn't help feeling that she only talked to me because I was new and therefore the centre of attention.

Jasper however became less and less conversational. Weird. Whatever. I still tried to be as friendly as I could but I couldn't help but feel he wanted me to go away for some reason. It made no sense. He had been so nice the first day.

I started noticing him around school more than I probably should have too. I blamed it on his height and super distinctive (and gorgeous) blond hair. He was always wearing a dull green army jacket and shades outside. He was also in a couple of Edward's classes, he liked Hawaiian pizza (observed from caf line up), played the guitar (heard from Eric who was in the music program), had a silver motorbike (observed while driving in to school in the morning), hated rap music (heard from Jess) and most importantly yet, he was single (again heard from Jess) and had turned down Lauren last month (heard from a bitter Lauren).

So what if I was turning into a bit of an obsessed stalker? Or maybe I was just being...observant and naturally curious.

...Okay, maybe stalkerish. But I couldn't help myself. Whenever I saw him, I was completely fixated.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: **

The week was pretty much over before I knew it. Mmm art class. Finally, my favourite class of the day. I had already established a good reputation with the teacher and we were all finishing up our pastel unit. People were busy cutting mat board to frame the ones they wanted to go in the up-coming school art show. I had always worked fast in art class because I loved the subject so much and therefore had already finished my drawing in just the few days I had been here.

As usual, Mike was sitting on my one side and the Jasper on my other. I had spent the first ten minutes of class trying to kill conversation with Mike so I could work in peace. Eventually I put on my iPod headphones and he seemed to get the hint. I get so caught up in music, it's funny. I was half dancing along to a song while I marked out a frame, completely not caring what anyone around me thought.

I cut the top section free then put down the exacto knife I was using to change the song. Nodding along to the catchy intro of the new song I spun the paper around, in the process accidentally knocking the exacto knife off the corner of my desk. Without even thinking about it I reached out to grab it. Unfortunately for me and my overly developed reflexes, the blade was still out and made solid contact with the centre of my palm as my fingers curled around it.

'Oh FUDGE!' I growled sharply, dropping it just as fast. 'Ow! Dammit.' I shook my hand for a second, startled by the sharp pain stabbing in the middle of it.

I was standing there, facing Jasper, examining my hand with a shocked expression on my face when my eyes flicked up to in time to see him look up, drop his pencil, turn and just walk away and out of the art room without even a backwards glance at me.

I stared after him, stunned. He had clearly seen my hand and hadn't even asked if I was okay. I was strangely furious. Blood streamed out of the cut - a drop slipped between my fingers and onto my desk.

Mike was by my side in a flash, freaking out a little and grabbing me paper towels to stop the blood from going everywhere. 'I'm fine,' I muttered, more annoyed than in pain now. Mike insisted on telling the teacher and then taking me to the nurse's straight away. I gave in, knowing that it was probably best, though not willingly giving in to listening to a solid half hour of Mike's concerned questions.

What I really wanted to do at that moment was to hunt down Jasper, wherever he had disappeared to, and demanded what the heck his problem was. Was he scared I might get my icky gross blood near him or something? His complete lack of concern also annoyed me much more than it probably should have - something else I had to try and control sometime in the near future for my own sanity...

The nurse dosed my hand with disinfectant that burned and bandaged it up too tightly. I would have to get Carlisle to look at it properly when I got home for sure. 'Take a couple of Tylenol for the pain, okay sweetie?' the nurse advised. 'Yeah sure,' I muttered stalking out with my hand pressed against my stomach. It still stung and I really did not feel like being called 'sweetie' right now.

Edward found me sitting on the hood of his car when he came out of class at the end of the day. I was listening to some heavy metal music to match my fuming mood and glaring at the low hanging grey clouds.

'Bad day, squirt?' he asked sympathetically.

'Bad is an understatement,' I growled. He gave me a hand down as I jumped off the car.

'What happened?' He raised the bandaged hand he was holding.

'Art class accident,' I said without elaborating.

'Explain?'

'I just have too fast reflexes for my own good, that's all. I grabbed a falling exacto knife and speared myself.' 'Ouch.' 'Exactly. Now take me home, I want Carlisle to fix it properly. The nurse here is an idiot.' Edward laughed and obeyed my request.

Later that night, after dinner I was lying on my black and purple covered bed trying to finish up some homework. My hand was neatly bandaged now Carlisle had taken a look at it when I got home from school and declared I needed a couple of stitches. The cut was short but surprisingly deep. Even though my hand was numbed, I didn't particularly enjoy the experience. I think it grossed Edward out more than me though. I had insisted on watching while my squeamish brother had left the room - most things that other people found creepy I was just fascinated by. Well I had to admit I was kind of weird anyway.

Unfortunately the anaesthetic was wearing off by now and it hurt if I tried to close my hand into a fist. Guess I wouldn't be punching too many people any time in the near future I thought sarcastically to myself. Not like there's anyone I want to punch right now of course... Ugh. And I hadn't even had the chance to interrogate Jasper yet. I mean, seriously! Who just glares and then walks away when someone hurts themselves right in front of them?! Okay so we may not be best friends or anything, but we weren't enemies. I'd done nothing to him except perhaps scare him with my crazy dance moves during art class. Growling I gave up on homework and shoved the binder away from me and fell back against my pillows. Closing my eyes, I ran through my head what to say to Jasper when I saw him tomorrow.

* * * *

The next thing I knew, Esme was calling my name from downstairs. 'Alice? Hon, it's quarter to! Aren't you up yet?'

'Wha? Time...late...what?' I mumbled, rolling over trying to see my bedside alarm clock. Something fell onto my floor with a loud clunk, startling me enough to wake up properly. Leaning over I saw it was just my binder that had slipped off the bed - I must have fallen asleep straight after dinner and no one had bothered to wake me. Then I saw the time. I had less than fifteen minutes to get up, dressed and presentable. 'Oh SHIT!' I squeaked, rolling off the bed onto the floor. I scrambled up and sprinted for the shower.

I grabbed the first clothes I saw as I raced from the shower to make my face presentable. I hadn't washed off my make up from last night and I had to scrub at the black mascara raccoon circles under my eyes. I left my hair as is and pulled on jeans and a plain black sweater. Grabbing my brown leather jacket off a chair, I threw my binder back into my school bag and raced down the stairs.

Edward was standing by the door waiting for me, looking fresh and neatly dressed as usual. How he managed to wake up and always look so cheerful in the mornings was beyond me.

'Over slept a little there?' he smirked at me, observing my ruffled hair and matching scowl.

'Oh shut up,' I growled. I tried to do my eye make up in the car on the drive over, but my dear brother decided to tease me and swerved around all the corners so fast it was an impossible task unless I wanted to have black wiggly lines all over my face for the rest of the day. The morning passed slowly. My hand hurt and I had forgotten to grab a couple of Aspirin on the way out the door to numb the sting. I scowled through English, wishing I could get rid of Mike's constantly asking how my hand was. It freaking hurt. End of story. Stop asking every other two minutes! I made up a story about needing to go to the library at lunch to get away. My patience was very thin and I didn't want to snap at people without meaning to.

I decided to sit outside that day instead of in the caf, dumping my bag down on a picnic table under some trees near the parking lot. Sitting cross legged on the table with my back to the school I pulled out my iPod and cranked the volume up so I could tune out reality for at least a couple of minutes. The only redeeming quality about the whole day was that it was a Friday at very least and I wouldn't have to deal with Jasper's issues for the next two whole days. I didn't even hear someone walk up and sit down at the same table.

'Hey Alice.'

I jerked around, surprised to see Bella sit down right next to me. I pulled the headphones from my ears and turned to face her. 'Hey Bella. What's up?'

'I was going to ask you the same thing. What are you doing out here all by yourself?' She didn't sound angry or like she was hunting for gossip, she just sounded worried.

'Nothing much. Just wallowing in self misery,' I teased myself holding up my hand as an excuse.

'Figured it must be something like that. Mike told me what happened.'

'Figures. He would probably tell the whole school,' I muttered, annoyed by this piece of news.

'Don't be too hard on him. He's a nice guy and he meant well,' Bella said with half a smile.

I raised an eyebrow at her. 'Oh did I just hear a defence there? Mike caught your eye there, miss Bella?' The other girl blushed and shook her head insistently. 'No! Of course not! I was only trying to be nice. He's my friend, remember?'

'Sure he is...' I trailed off suggestively.

'I don't like him like that!' she protested again, trying not to laugh.

'Sounds a little over defensive to me...'

'You're impossible!' she declared, folding her arms and mock pouting.

'If it's not Mike, then whoooo?' I was onto the scent of something here and determined to find out. Bella only grinned wider and looked away over my shoulder. I already had a pretty good idea who it might be either way so I decided to test out my theory. 'Aw come on Bella! Please? Please, please, please tell me who?'

'No one! I don't like anyone.'

'Yeah sure, that's the biggest lie I've heard yet since Jess told me Edward asked her out.'

Bella's eyebrows shot way up at this statement. 'He did not! Did he? No way! He wouldn't -' she stammered.

'Why not?' I pushed.

'Because I thought - he wouldn't - not like him...' Bella caught on and suddenly stopped talking. She glared at me accusingly. I only smiled innocently. 'I knew it! Ha!' I gloated my victory.

'Aw Alice, that was playing dirty!' Bella grumbled.

'You two make such a great couple!' I giggled, hopping off the table so I could jump around in excitement.

'Edward is just my friend, Alice! Seriously, I don't think he thinks of me like that!'

'That's not what _I_ heard...' She was on me in a second. Grabbing my hand to stop me from dancing away, 'What did you hear?!' she demanded frantically. 'I'm not saying anything.' 'Well if you won't tell me, then I won't tell you what I heard about _you_,' Bella tried as a tactical manoeuvre.

'What about me?' I asked, puzzled.

'Well, that um, you're actually emo and super depressed and cut yourself on purpose in art class.' Bella was such a lousy liar it was almost funny. She stumbled slightly over her sentence and tried to keep her eyes wide and innocent.

'Mmhmm...' I nodded slowly, clearly not believing a single word she said, 'Anything else?' Bella bit her lip and shifted her weight back and forth.

'Umm...' 'That's what I thought.'

'Well give me a shot at guessing who _you_ like and then we'll see whose laughing,' she declared.

'Probably me. Give it your best shot.'

'Well Mike for sure, total give away.'

'Hey! He may follow me around like a puppy but I don't like him like that!'

'How about Eric? I know how much you love those gorgeous dark haired types.'

I pretended to swoon. 'Anyone else? Come on girl, be more original here.'

'Okay fine.' Bella stared into the distance over my shoulder for a few moments. Then her eyes suddenly lit up with inspiration. 'How about oh say, Jasper?' She was still looking at someone behind me. I knew I was giving myself dead away, but for some reason I couldn't resist turning around to see if it was who I thought it was. A blond figure was sitting on the steps of the main building. The distinctive army jacket gave it away as Jasper. I blushed and looked away quickly in case he caught me. 'Nice Alice. You have good taste,' Bella appraised. I knew it would be hopeless to try and deny it now. I shrugged, 'Hate to break it to your scheming but he's not interested in me.' 'And how do you know that?' 'Ugh. I don't want to talk about it,' I groaned, not wanting to explain my convoluted reasoning. 'You sure?' '110% positive. Not now at least.' 'Which ever you want,' Bella accepted easily, 'Come on let's go, the bell's about to ring.'

Last period class was nerve wracking. I wanted to yell at him the entire time but I held it all in, knowing just how irrational I would sound. He ignored me and I pretended to ignore him. I was so glad when final bell rung and I could leave all the confused silence behind.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: **

Art class again. Monday again and we were moving on to portrait drawing. 'Alright everyone,' Ms Caffrey called out after the bell rang, 'As announced last Friday, we'll be starting our portrait unit today and I would like everyone to partner up with the person next to you and start out with some basic sketch studies. Switch turns after fifteen minutes. Off you go now.'

Everyone turned and twisted, snagging a partner to work with. Before Mike even had the chance to act, Jasper surprised us all. 'Alice?' His quiet voice was so distinctive to me even in the loud classroom. I looked up at him a little aloof. 'Yes Jasper?' 'Would you like to work with me today?'

The request took me off guard, as if whatever had made him so hostile last week was completely forgotten. 'Um, yeah, sure,' I stammered slightly. This was completely unexpected - I wanted to be mad at him for ignoring me earlier but couldn't quite bring myself to spoil our rare time together.

I could feel Mike's death glare drilling into Jasper's forehead so I spun my chair away to face my new partner and pulled out my over sized sketch pad and my trusty 6B pencil. 'You first or me?' I tried to ask casually, but my voice came out a little squeaky at the end.

'Why don't you go ahead.'

'Okay!' I squeaked out. I made a show of arranging myself and flipping to a fresh sheet of paper. 'Um, face me? And turn a little to your left,' I instructed him. He did as I asked but kept his eyes focussed on me. 'Um, look to the left a little more,' I asked, hoping he would stop looking directly at me. He turned his head a fraction more but his eyes never left me. This was totally going to throw me off my entire drawing. I hated working when people could walk behind me and look at what I was doing. It made me self conscious. This was a million times worse. Or maybe it was just because the subject I was trying to sketch was simply the more perfect male I had ever seen in my life. ...It might have been an element of that too.

I started working despite my slightly shaking hand and tried my best to keep my expression neutral every time I looked up at him. I got his profile lines sketched out nicely, then moved onto his features. I had started shading everything in when I realised I still had to do the eyes. This was going to be a challenge. At least he was a good model - he hadn't so much as moved an inch the whole time. I could hear Mike behind me complaining to the girl he was working with to stop fidgeting.

Concentrate already, I told myself and then set to work at the near impossible task of capturing the pure beauty of his eyes and the unfathomable expression hidden behind them. I didn't realise I'd been holding my breath until I put in the final details and looked up for the last time to make sure I hadn't missed anything.

Jasper was smiling as I dropped my pencil when the teacher called time to switch. 'So? Do I get to see the finished product?' he asked lightly, but there was strange edge to his voice, something I couldn't identify. I tilted my head, looking between my drawing and him a few more times, caught up in the miracle that I'd somehow managed to capture his expression for even only a second. Or maybe that's just what my mind wanted me to think. To pretend that I knew anything about him or what he was thinking. I wanted to just sit there and muse over exactly what that might be, but his question brought me back to real time.

'Go ahead.' I passed it over with a shrug, as if I didn't think much of my work. His eyebrows came together as he took in his portrait. I wished so much that he would tell me what he was thinking about it. But then of course my artist's side came out - we're our own worst critics any day and I couldn't help explaining what I wanted to change. It was just habit.

'The angle of your right eyebrow is totally wrong and I made the shading too dark. Oh and the eyes definitely didn't work out how I wanted them to, I hoped that I-'

He cut my little rant off by handing the art pad back to me. 'No,' he shook his head, 'No the eyes are perfect.' He was still staring at it, not me, giving me a brief moment to analyse his expression. Admiration. Desperation? Confused a little? It was hard to tell.

'My turn,' he motioned for me to sit up. I felt very self conscious as he directed me where to look. 'Look up and then right a bit. Raise your head just a tiny bit. Here, like this.' I nearly fell off my chair when he suddenly leaned forward and gently turned the angle of my face, his fingers lingering for a moment under my chin. I barely managed to keep myself composed. Then I had to stay perfectly still, although I was dying to reach over and catch his hand as it fell away from my face.

Needless to say it was a very long fifteen minutes. I didn't think I could manage the same as he had with constant eye contact the entire time so I looked away to the side. I let my mind drift to distract myself. I was completely lost in thought when he announced he was finished and I could move again. I blinked, a little dazed and then looked at him expectantly, waiting for him to hand over his own attempt to capture me. He seemed very reluctant to show me. His almost worried expression twisted into a half smile as he finally relinquished the paper. 'Here you go. I doubt it's anywhere as good as yours was,' he teased himself. I took it curiously and flipped it right side up. And was astonished.

'No,' I breathed, 'It's far, far better.' The detail and lines in his drawing looked so natural, it was as if he had memorized every angle of my face before hand. My expression was like looking into a mirror but with a half smile I was pretty sure hadn't been there in real life. Yet he had managed to make it look perfectly natural.

'I don't remember smiling for the picture,' I accused jokingly.

Jasper looked a little abash. 'Well I thought it looked more like you that way. You're always smiling in real life.' His answer stunned me, but before I could gather myself together Ms Caffrey descended on us and demanded to see our work. She too looked amazed when she held the pair together.

'That's beautiful Alice, you really caught his expression but with room for interpretation with those looser lines. Jasper, that's a mirror image our Alice, gorgeous attention to detail! You two should work together more often.' She praised us both and handed them back.

'Well it's easy to make a beautiful drawing when you have a beautiful subject,' Jasper said lightly. He had a heart stopping half smile on his lips and he raised one eye brow teasingly. I definitely couldn't breathe for a moment, this was so different from the Jasper I had met last week.

'Thanks, you too,' I admitted. His half grin became a full blown smile and I couldn't look away even if Mike had stabbed my hand with another exacto knife right then. The bell rang, freeing us for the rest of the day. I tucked my art pad containing my precious drawing in with my books and looked up to find Jasper waiting for me. He never had before.

'So are you going on that beach expedition this coming weekend?' I asked trying to make conversation - Mike had called last night to explain his plans. So far I wasn't entirely sure I wanted to go, I wasn't really that outdoorsy. Jasper walked slowly by my side.

'I don't think I was invited.'

'Well I'm inviting you?' It came out like a question, unsure if he would be welcome to the idea of spending more time with me.

'Who else is going?' he asked instead of saying yes or no. I reeled off a list of nearly a dozen other names. At least with other people it wouldn't be so awkward than if we were alone. Then again, I knew I would much rather have the silence and Jasper all to myself than anything else. Judging by the time it took for him to answer, it seemed like some of the names disagreed with him, especially Mike's.

'That sounds like a well planned event, I wouldn't want to intrude.' Take that as a no... Well if he wanted to avoid all the other people, that was cool with me. I decided to try one more time. 'Or we could hang out some other time if you wanted? What are you doing after school today?' I was surprised at myself for going this far so suddenly.

Jasper gave me curious look. 'Right now?'

'Yeah sure, why not? We could go...um...' Now I stuck, I couldn't think of anything interesting to do in Forks. Jasper seemed to be thinking the same thing and joined in my laughing at myself.

'I keep forgetting where I am,' I said shaking my head, 'That I'm in a tiny town without even a movie theatre.'

'I know what you mean,' he sympathised. We were walking out the front doors of the school by now. 'Wait, so you haven't always lived in Forks either?' I asked. He must be the first person I knew around here who wasn't Forks born and bred.

'No,' he shook his head slowly, 'I only moved here a year ago. I've been missing the big city ever since.'

'So where do you come from then?' I asked, probably sounding nosy but I didn't care.

'East. New York state.' He didn't elaborate and the way he said it made it feel like that particular subject was closed. For now at least. 'Hey, maybe we should schedule a road trip together down to Seattle or something and reunite ourselves with the city lights we're both missing? Or we could take it in stages and start out slowly with Port Angeles. Wouldn't want to overdose or something,' I teased, 'So? How 'bout it?'

I glanced up but the expression that had suddenly appeared on Jasper's face sent my smile flying away in an instant. 'Jasper? What's wrong?' He stopped walking and suddenly turned around, facing the steps we had just come down. His expression looked pained, his eyes tight.

'I...forgot I have an assignment due tomorrow I need to work on. I can't hang out right now. Sorry,' he said in a rush before he disappeared, dashing back up the stairs into the school leaving me confused and alone.

'Um. Okay. Sure.' I was speaking to empty air, but I didn't really notice. That was unexpected. What did I say wrong? I ran back over our conversation in my head while I wandered over to Edward's car. I leaned against the passenger door, figuring my brother was staying late to talk to a certain girl who needed help with her biology homework... The parking lot was mainly empty by now, all the other students had left and just the teacher's cars were left.

After a few minutes, the school's front doors slammed open and a figure came stalking out. It was Jasper, a black motorcycle helmet in hand, wearing the dull green army jacket he had had over the back of his chair during art. He made his way over the far corner of the lot where a shiny silver motorbike was standing, usually hidden by a crowd of pickup trucks during the rest of the day. He didn't seem to notice me as he sped past and off school property, the snarl of the engine eventually dying away.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: **

The next couple of days passed as usual. Jasper's friendliness disappeared, leaving us exactly as we had been the week before. It was getting more and more depressing with every passing day - the one taste of his real personality made me long for it more than ever. Edward of course noticed the change in my usual bouncy mood straight away. The evening after Jasper had walked out on me on the school steps, Edward caught me looking at the portrait. I was sitting in my window seat holding the drawing up to the light to see how the shadows changed the expression on the page.

'I wish I could figure you out,' I murmured.

A moment later Edward had knocked on my door and I scrambled to close the sketch book.

'What's up, squirt?' he asked wandering over to my window. I leaned my head back and blew a strand of purple hair out of my face.

'Nothing.'

'Right. That explains the miserable look on your face these past few days perfectly. Come on Alice, you can tell me. And if you don't tell me, I'll have to guess. And you know I'll get it right anyway.'

'Go ahead, I'm not saying anything.'

'Well this is a wild leap of faith here, but could this possible be about a boy?' Scowling, I reached over to smack him with the sketch book. How did he know?! I had never gone all sulky like this over a guy before. I guess none of them had felt so important before... 'I'm right, just admit it and I won't have to add all the gory details.'

'Ugh fine, yes you're right and you're freaking annoying.'

'So whose the lucky guy then? Or do I have to guess that too?' Then his eyes fell on my sketch book and before I could react he grabbed it out of my hands with lightening speed, dancing away from me to flip through it.

'Edward! Give that back right now!' I tried to tackle him but my lack of height and weight had little affect but to make him take half a step back to regain his balance. Too late anyway, he was already to the last page and was staring a little wide eyed at Jasper's picture. 'Edward, please give it back, it's personal.'

'Wow. Alice, this is amazing. It looks just like him. I never realised you were so good at faces.' When he had even met Jasper to know what he looked like was beyond me.

'How do even know who is it?' I glared, still reaching for the book back. 'Jasper's friends with Emmett.' 'Emmett?' 'Friend from Gym class. Emmett's dating his older sister.' 'Wait, Jasper has a sister?' 'Yeah, she's a grade older than us, blonde and a little on the vain side if you ask me.' 'I never knew that...' Somehow this trivial piece of news was fascinating to me. Then again, everything about Jasper was fascinating to me... 'He never told me that. What's she like? Did she move here at the same time as him?'

'Don't ask me, squirt, if you sit next to him everyday in class, you must have more opportunity to talk to him than I do.' My pout in response to this assumption must have tipped him off to the exact situation.

'Ah. I see. He doesn't want to talk to you? Why not? What did you do - draw a moustache on one of his portraits?'

'No! Of course not. He's just being unfair and ridiculous and antisocial and- and- and he started it!'

'Um, okay, I'm not sure I'm following you here.'

'I was just minding my own business and he ignores me everyday and when I hurt my hand last week, he totally walked away without so much as an 'are you okay'! I mean, who the hell does that? And then he started being all weird yesterday and got all hissy when I suggested we hang out and then - ARG! It doesn't make any sense!' I threw up my hands and stomped around my room, wishing I could punch something like a wall without hurting myself.

'Maybe he's just intimidated by you? You can be a little bit more enthusiastic than most people are use to. Not that that's a bad thing!' He quickly added seeing my murderous look. 'If he's got something on his mind, don't push it. Give him space and time and make sure you're open minded when he decides he does want to talk.'

'Ugh. Fine. If he ever _does_ decide he wants to associate with the crazy hyper chick again.'

'I'm sure he will. Just be patient.'

'Yeah because you know how well I do in the 'patient' category...'

'Hey always time to try new things.' I chucked a pillow at him in response, which resulted in his grabbing me by an arm and a leg and tickling me to the ground before throwing me over his shoulder and marching me down the stairs, blatantly ignoring my hysterical protests the entire way. He brought me into the kitchen probably enjoying the puzzled look on Esme's face.

'I found a little something to cook up. She's a bit on the small side and will need fattening up but she'd be excellent with gravy,' he commented lightly to our adoptive mother.

'Edward! Put me down already! Or else I'll tell Bella all about your cannibalistic tendencies.' That worked in a hurry.

'You would not!' he protested, probably cringing at how silly the situation would sound to anyone else.

'Try me,' I struck my tongue out at him.

'Whose Bella?' Esme asked curiously. Giggling I bolted back upstairs leaving an annoyed Edward to explain himself.

* * * *

It was the next day that things started to get a little weird.

My mind felt strangely hazy when I woke up and my step felt slightly off balance. I was careful going down any stairs. When Edward commented on the drive over to school that I looked pale I insisted I was just feeling a little car sick. The rest of the day, I continued to feel ...'off'. I felt ever so slightly dizzy which I didn't notice until I moved too quickly or stood up suddenly. No one else that I normally hung out with was sick, so I didn't think I had caught one of the usual bugs going around. I struggled through dinner, feeling exhausted even though it been a regular day.

'What's the matter, Alice?' Esme looked concerned when I didn't finish half my food.

'I'm just really tired that's all. I think I'll go to bed early.'

'That probably best if you're not feeling well.' I was passed out almost asleep in bed when she came to check on me ten minutes later. She kissed my forehead and shut my door quietly. The next few hours were a strange limbo like state. I couldn't tell if I was awake or asleep. Some parts felt so real, voices that were talking elsewhere in the house made sense, then later sometimes they didn't.

The next time I woke up fully, I felt wide awake and strangely panicky. My heart was going a million beats a minute and the dizziness that had been threatening to surface all day had finally done so, so that when I sat up, my dark room swirled. I got up slowly to got get some more water, not having any clue of what time it was or how long I had been asleep. I grabbed my watch which was lying on my dresser as I stumbled by. 3:24 am.

I made it to the bathroom and took a long drink of water. I stood staring at my bathroom mirror without really seeing my reflection for a long time after that; my hands were pressed firmly against the white marble counter. I couldn't calm down even after nearly half an hour, I only felt worse. This was becoming absurd. I was losing my mind. I raised one hand to pushed away the limp hair that was hanging half across my face. I was appalled to see my hand was shaking slightly. I paused to take a deep breath, trying to settle my tensed body and swirling mind. My gaze shifted from my hand back to my reflected face.

I looked so pale. Nothing like my usual colouring. It was like my entire face had been painted one solid shade with no colouring or shading left anywhere. It set my eyes off in an interesting way though, making my usually bright hazel irises look dark. The make up I hadn't bothered to wash off before I fell asleep made the area around my eyes darker, almost a grey purple that looked surreal to me. It looked like I was wearing stage make up. Exaggerated.

I drew another shuddering breath and realised how close I was leaning to the mirror. Suddenly I felt the scene before me swim and I had to brace one palm against the mirror's smooth surface to steady myself. I couldn't even think straight anymore. All my thoughts were jumbled up in my head with all my doubts and all these weird feelings of premonition. It made no sense. I needed to calm down somehow. I was getting desperate. I have never felt like this before in my life. So out of control. So unsettled. So...unlike me in everyway. And it scared me. I had no idea what was happening inside my mind or what would happen next.

Desperate for anything that would let me sleep, maybe help this strange feeling pass, I turned to the bathroom cupboard next to the mirror. I moved a little too fast for my whirling head and had to grab the counter for support. I pressed my hand to my forehead, wishing this strange shakiness would all just stop, whatever it was. I opened the cupboard to hunt down some anti-nausea medication. The kinda that always made me fall asleep within 15 minutes, plus it might help with the dizziness, but I couldn't even find the bottle.

Everything kept moving the second I focussed my eyes on a single spot, then drifted until I blinked. If I hadn't been feeling so damn awful I would have been very annoyed. Instead I just gave up and stumbled from the bathroom back to my bedroom. I was half way between the bathroom door and my bed when everything turned grey. Then coloured dots appeared sparking all over my field of vision. They rapidly gave way to black.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6: **

I was having the strangest dream. I was watching people from school. Jessica and Angela. And Bella. And Mike and Eric. They were all in the forest, the sound of waves crashing on a beach nearby. All talking and laughing. Eric was making fun of Mike about not being able to find his way around his own room he had such a poor sense of direction. Mike glaring at Eric when Eric's back was turned. Obviously he didn't enjoy his pride being wounded in front of all the girls. Then the sharply focussed scene went fuzzy and then melted into another one. It was darker now, cooler and a little misty, how it always was in the forest at dusk. It was just Bella and Jessica and Mike now. All three were wearing unhappy expressions. Mike looked nervous and Jess a little scared. Bella looked like she was just as nervous but was trying to put on a brave face for Jessica. They kept stopping and turning around. The scene kept changing, kept showing them in different places.

Then the dreams went completely blank for what felt like a long time with occasional flicks of light or blurry colour. The next dream surprised me, even in my hazy and numb minded state, when I saw Jasper appear in the next coherent scene. He was smiling at me, talking but I couldn't hear the words. Then he turned away and looked back, the smile gone, a furious expression on his face. Then black and flickers, then Jasper again, this time lying on the pavement with an impressive but scratched up silver motorbike next to him. I squinted, trying to focus as a strong sense of foreboding filling me. 'Jasper?' I called. He was on the ground and he wasn't moving. That couldn't be good. 'Jasper!' I called out more desperately this time, trying to reach out to him but I couldn't move. The scene slipped into obscured darkness before I could do anything else. I felt like I was being dragged backwards and I could hear voices as well as feel the rhythm of my own breathing, something I hadn't been aware of in my bizarre dreams.

I heard someone say my name. I still felt oddly floaty but I was beginning to get annoyed at the same time. Why were these voices talking about me? I was right here, didn't they realise it was rude? My mind felt surprisingly normal again. The dizziness seemed to be gone too I realised. Or maybe that was just because my eyes were closed.

I did seem to be moving though. How strange, I thought I was asleep? Maybe I was sleep walking or something. I risked opening an eye to peek at what was going on around me. Much to my surprise Edward's face was right next to mine. I blinked, opening both eyes this time. My brother's very worried eyes were inches from mine.

'Edward?' I asked, my voice sounding strangely weak.

'Oh my god, Alice! Are you okay? What happened?' He sounded extremely upset. When I tried to sit up and couldn't I finally came to realise that he was carrying me. 'Alice?' he prompted me again. He gently placed me on my bed then sat down next to me, an anxious expression on his face.

'I have no idea...what - why were you carrying me? Wait, what time is it?' He gave me strange look when I asked for the time before answering it was nearly four in the morning. 'So what - was I asleep or something? What happened, why are you in my room?' I felt extremely confused and tired.

Edward shook his head unhappily, 'Don't you remember anything?' My dead silence got him to explain things for me. 'I couldn't sleep and saw the light on in your room from across the hall. Then I heard a thump, like someone falling off a bed or something. But then I didn't hear any movement afterwards which was a bit strange, so I came and knocked on your door and when no one answered I got really worried. I came in to find you passed out in the middle of your room! I was about to run for Carlisle when you said something. A name or something. How are you feeling now? Will you be okay for a minute so I can go grab Carlisle?' His expression was still distressed.

'How long since this happened?' I mumbled. 'I don't know, maybe four or five minutes ago?'

'That short a time?' He stopped half way to the door.

'What do you mean?' 'I - it just felt like longer, that's all.'

'What did?' He looked even more puzzled.

'The dreams. They seemed like forever.' I was staring blankly trying to remember how they went again. It was maddening the way their details kept slipping away.

'I'll be right back. Stay right there, okay?' he said as he reached the door.

'Yeah sure,' I mumbled, slumping back against my pillows. I closed my eyes, too tired to keep them open. I must have fallen asleep because I didn't hear Edward come back into my room hurriedly explaining the situation to Carlisle.

'Alice?' My name called me back to reality again. 'Mmm?' I murmured, too sleepy to bother opening my eyes.

'Alice honey, can you open your eyes for me?' Oh fine, if I have to. Carlisle's concerned face filled my vision. 'Can you hear me?' 'Yeah.' 'What happened, honey? Do you remember?'

'Sorta,' I murmured.

'How do you feel now?'

'Better. Lemme sleep now.' Edward started to protest, but luckily Carlisle stopped him. 'She seems alright now. Let her rest, we'll talk about it in the morning.'

'But what if it happens again? I'm staying here to make sure,' I heard Edward insisting.

'She'll be fine, son. Don't disturb her, her body just needs to recuperate now.'

'I promise I won't wake her up, I just don't want to take any chances.' Carlisle gave in with a sigh and a smile before he whispered goodnight and he left, even though it was technically morning by now.

Friday again and I had insisted on going to school. I felt normal now and figured it was just food poisoning or something. I had explained everything I could in the morning to Carlisle and he said I should be fine. However Edward told me to call him the second I changed my mind and he would take me home again.

'I'll be fine, I promise. It was just a stomach bug.' But the expression on my face gave me away that I wasn't entirely sure about what exactly it had been... I spent most of my morning not paying attention to my classes. I was too busy thinking about the bizarrely clear dreams I had experienced while passed out. Did people dream when they fainted? Was that normal?

I wished it wouldn't happen again. But it did. Over the weekend the strange feeling of nerves and dizziness came back. But the symptoms came on much faster this time. Within fifteen or so minutes I must have passed out - I was being smart this time and lay down on my bed straight away, waiting for it to go away. And I had the same dream-like visions again. I watched Eric accidentally knock over a whole cartoon of chocolate milk onto Bella in the caf. What an odd thing to dream about. It was dark with flickers of light for while, then the fuzzy blackness cleared to show Edward appeared from one angle, then another, the perspective dancing around before settling for an overhead view.

Edward was walking with Emmett and Jasper - I recognized the distinctive blonde hair - along the forest path behind the school. It was a well used short cut into town if you didn't want to go by road. The trees were covered in green lichen and dripping wet like usual. The dark mulched path twisted between them, bright green ferns encroaching on all sides.

The three were walking and chatting although I couldn't hear their voices. The dream was strangely silent until out of nowhere an earth shaking growl rip through the air. Something huge and black rose up out of the waist high ferns beside the path and charged towards the three now motionless figures. Then the whole scene went completely black.

I awoke with a start. It had just been a nightmare. Another bizarre nightmarish dream. I tried to shake it off for the rest of the evening but I couldn't get the deeply menacing growl out of my head. I didn't tell anyone else of the reoccurrence of my fainting, besides I felt perfectly fine after apart from a little shaken. It was all in my head, I told myself. Probably due to the stress from moving or something - nothing to get worked up about. I could deal.

Or so I thought.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7: **

The next day brought me to realise that maybe I couldn't deal.

My ear perked up immediately when I heard about how the weekend beach trip I had declined to go on had turned into a disaster. Apparently half of them had gotten lost while out on a hike and Jessica insisted on telling all the gory details of how it was all Mike's fault and if he hadn't insisted on showing off his apparently well trained navigation skills it never would have happened. Eric and Angela had gotten split up and made it back to the cars before the others. When the others didn't show up by dusk, they had become really worried and Eric had called the police to help them look. This was sounding spookily familiar...

Jess was ranting on about how embarrassing it had been to be so hopelessly lost the police had had to hunt them down with sniffer dogs. 'It makes me look like a complete idiot! I bet the whole school knows now!' she glared at Mike furiously. Bella just shrugged and said it had only been scary when it started to get dark. Outside I kept a straight face but inside I could feel myself being pushed even further over the edge.

'Alice? You okay?' Bella asked me from across the table, 'You look really pale today.' I opened my mouth to assure her I was great (a big fat lie) when my sense of deja vu kicked in the same moment as Eric came up behind her, tripped over a chair leg and knocked the open milk cartoon out of his hand. And straight into Bella's lap. I didn't have time to warn her and could only stare semi-terrified.

That made two 'dreams' that had come true. The last one I hadn't been entirely sure about because I hadn't been there when the others had gotten lost. I had been trying to pass it off as me worrying about my friends. It was just coincidence. But now I realised what I had being trying to deny ever since my first episode last week. That these dreams, visions, whatever were in fact showing me something real. Things that were going to happen in the future.

Then I thought back in horror to my latest vision. The one of Edward. The huge black shape by the path - it could only have been one thing. It may only be very early spring but it had been warm recently. Bears came out of hibernation hungry and irritable. There were many reported cases of them around the hiking trails, though usually they didn't venture into town. Today was an exception. But then WHY was I seeing these things? How? It made no sense. And was it possible to change the future now that I knew what was coming? I had to try. I absolutely had to find Edward as soon as possible and stop them from taking the short cut.

Meanwhile Bella was dripping in chocolate milk and gapping in disbelief at her now chocolate coated jeans. I snapped back to reality and remembered that I had a spare pair of sweat pants for Gym in my locker and dragged her off to get cleaned up. Then I bolted to find Edward. I had no idea what time the vision was suppose to occur at, it could be at any point during the day, even right now. I sprinted back to the caf, scanning for Edward who sat with Emmett and Jasper and a couple other guys on the days he didn't sit with me and Bella. No sign of them. Arrg! Where was he? I decided to check outside incase they were already on their way.

On the way out the doors I heard Emmett's distinctively loud voice. He was teasing Edward loudly about being too shy around girls as the three of them walked together towards the forest on the opposite side of the parking lot. Now that I had actually found them, I was presented with a new problem - I had to come up with valid reason for them to stay out of the forest without sounding crazy. And I had about ten seconds to figure something out.

I was half way around the side of the lot when the familiar dizziness set in. 'Not again!' I wanted to scream in frustration. Too late, everything went sideways and then black.

* * *

Flashes of the future popped up. Jess trying to impress Mike in soccer and spraining her ankle. Eric eating too many hot dogs for a dare against Mike and Ben and then getting sick. That one was actually kind of funny. Then Jasper and the motorbike again. Why did that one keep appearing? Then I was awake again. I carefully opened my eyes. Then really wished I hadn't. The emu like face of the school nurse was peering at me from a barely a foot away. Scariest sight to wake up to. Ever.

I made up any old story to make the nurse let me go, then Edward, who had been waiting right outside told me he was taking me home straight away, no questions. I couldn't really complain, I had technically achieved my goal of keeping him from getting attacked by the bear. Edward wouldn't stop worrying until I outright told him to shut up.

'Edward! I'm fine! End of story! Can we not talk about this anymore?' I wished he would just drop it, and not make me feel guilty for not telling him the truth.

'Good grief Alice, how can you say this? This is getting serious.'

'Ugggh. Well I guess it must be getting annoying for you to have to carry me around when I keep dropping left, right and centre,' I teased, trying to change the subject.

'Actually it wasn't me this time.'

'What? Did I sleep walk to the nurse's or something?'

'No, it was Jasper who carried you in.'

'What?!'

'He was the first one over to you when Emmett turned around to see you, um, wipe out face first.' I laughed at his choice of words.

'Good thing I was on the grass and not the asphalt or that might have left a mark...' But _Jasper_ had carried me? What? This made no sense to me. 'So do the guys think I'm a total freak now or what?' I joked, fishing for more information.

'Well Emmett thinks you're hilarious, but Jasper said to call him later to let him know you were okay. Technically I wasn't suppose to tell you that, but I thought you might want to know.' He winked at me and I glared.

'Did you tell him...?' I growled.

'No! Of course not. I think you're just missing the obvious this time.' We pulled into the drive way. 'Gah, whatever.' I jumped out of the car then stopped, remembering what I had to do now. 'Ugh, why did I let you do this? I don't want to explain to them again.' Edward looked sympathetic but determined. 'They need to know, squirt.'

Esme of course was doubly worried and Carlisle decided to send me in for some blood work just in case. Edward came to talk to me in my room before dinner. I was locked in a deathly battle with some calculus homework and losing rather rapidly. 'So I called Jasper,' he started out, wiggling his eyebrows at me.

'Oh god, do I even _want_ to hear this? You're making it up, aren't you?'

'Now why would I do that?'

'Because you're my evil brother? Do you need another reason?'

'Do you want to hear what he said or not?'

'Ugh, fine, go ahead and do your worst.' I folded my arms and shook out my hair trying to look haughty.

'He said...drum roll please...that he was glad to hear that you were okay.'

'Wow that's so unexpected and shocking,' I muttered sarcastically, 'I was hoping for something juicier, please.' Secretly I was actually thrilled - not that I would ever admit it.

'Actually your accident was lucky in a weird sort of way,' he went on, 'I just heard from Bella who heard from her dad that there was bear wandering around town near the short cut this afternoon, a big black one right out of it's winter den. Guess it tried to take out someone's dog. So if we had gone that way we might have run into him and I don't really want to think about possibility.' Neither did I... 'Wow, yeah, that sure is lucky,' I agreed weakly.

More days passed. My blood work came out clean. I kept on having visions. But I knew there was no way I could tell anyone about them, they would only think I was crazy and result in me ending up in an asylum or worse. The visions came on so quickly now, I could control them and stay conscious while they passed in less than a minute. But the visions insisted on being seen - if I tried to resist, the stronger the symptoms became until eventually I would pass out and they would flood my mind.

If I closed my eyes and closed my mind for a minute or two, like I was taking a nap they would come and go without a fuss. I also found I could change things in the visions and stop them from happening, like I had with Edward. The future wasn't concrete it turned out. But I still kept on seeing them, and they always seemed to be bad things. People getting hurt or upset. I didn't want to know these things. I didn't want to see it and I didn't want to spend the rest of my life rushing around trying to save everyone at once.

What I wanted now was someone to save me. By the end of the week I just wanted to run away from it all.

Worst of all, I kept seeing the upcoming vision of Jasper on the ground and it was starting to kill me. It was the one part of the future that I was the most desperate to change but I had no clue how to go about it. Jasper never talked to me now, and whenever I tried to approach him he treated me with frosty disregard. Why he disliked me so much I could not figure out and I couldn't just walk up to him and say, oh hi, I saw you getting into motorcycle accident some time in the near future and I'm trying to save your life here so maybe you could not ride for while, ok? Right. Because that wouldn't classify me as a stalker or a psycho.

He must have thought I was really desperate in general because no matter how many times he tried to ignore me, I kept trying to talk to him. Okay so maybe I was desperate to be around him as much as possible, but at least I had a good reason for it! And seriously, how could you stop something in someone's life when they wouldn't let you in? It was for his own good really. Strangely this specific vision kept appearing the more I tried to think of ways to stop it. I took it's continual reoccurrence to mean that it was going to happen very soon. I found that I didn't usually end up having a new batch of visions until the old ones had happened or been interrupted so when the morning came that I woke up to a fresh set of visions, I was positive that today was the day. I was silent all the way to school and I ignored everyone through morning classes, my mind whirling out of control.

I was so stressed out by lunch time that I completely lost it when my binder slipped through my fingers and crashed onto the floor while I was trying to put it back into my locker. Tears started to blur my eyes, making me more and more angry. I reached to snatch the stupid thing off the ground so I could pitch it full speed into my locker with a satisfying crash when someone got there before me. I looked up to see Jasper holding my binder out to me, a surprisingly kind look on his face. Arg! Why did he keep...changing his mind about whether or not he hated me?!

I had the sudden urge to grab the binder and throw it at him instead but I didn't. Instead I slammed the locker door shut then turned to face him. 'Thanks,' I muttered, then waited for him to move - he was still standing in my way and my eyes were still filling up - I didn't really want to have a total melt down right in front of him. 'Hey, are you alright?' His curiosity, concern, whatever it was behind the unexpected question sent me over the edge. My tears spilled over all the way and I felt like I couldn't breathe.

'Go away!' I snapped, sounding fairly pathetic but I couldn't think of anything better to say for the moment.

For some strange reason he didn't move. 'No, not until you tell me what's wrong. What happened?' My hands formed fists. He didn't understand anything. I wanted to scream so badly.

'What's wrong? You freaking want to know what's actually _wrong_?'

He looked sheepish. 'Yes.'

'_Why?_' My fury was unfortunately unleashed... 'Why do you all of a sudden give a damn? What is it with you anyway? I don't understand you at all! You ignore me completely, then you're super nice, then you go back to ignoring me and now this! I just can't _deal_ with this right now!' My voice was cracked by the end of it and probably louder than I meant it to be. 'Excuse me, now please move out of my way or I will rip your limbs off gladly!' What can I say? I was pissed off.

He stepped aside and I stalked past fuming. Much to my surprise, he followed me, still talking. 'Alice, look...I hate the way I've been treating you...I didn't think you'd notice. If only you knew - I mean-'

'Knew _what_?' I asked scathingly.

'Knew why. It's...long and complicated. Just know that it's not you, it's all my fault. I'm sorry I'm acting like this...I just can't-' 'Can't what? Can't help being a jerk?' I snapped, finally stopping and turning to face him. He looked annoyed at himself, like he had said too much. 'If only you knew, this would-' he said quietly.

'Well I _don't_ know, so please, enlighten me!'

He ran a hand through his hair, looking just as stressed out as I felt. I was preparing to think up a snappy comeback as I didn't think he would actually provide an explanation. My heart nearly stopped when he gave in and said bitterly, 'Ok, fine, you win. I will explain. But not here, let's go some place else.' He turned and quickly stalked away towards the car park. I had to hurry to keep up.

Part of me was thrilled I was going to possibly figure him out once and for all. Sadly that part was greatly over shadowed my present fury and desperation about everything in general. I really did want to escape from everything right now. And in a way Jasper presented that exact escape. We made it over to his motorbike and he tossed me the shiny black helmet.

'Where are we going?' I demanded.

'Anywhere but here,' was his equally short but fierce reply.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8: **

We were outside town in less than five minutes - if we had passed any cop cars on the way, we would have gotten a ticket for sure. I had my arms wrapped around his waist as tightly as possible, trying not to chicken out and close my eyes. I was still reeling inside from the shock of being with him. Eventually we slowed to a more normal pace as Jasper seemed to calm down. When we passed a road stop diner he swerved so wildly to pulled in I felt like I was going to be flung off. It was only after we had finally parked in the gravel lot outside and he had turned off the engine did I dare let go of him. As much as I usually loved the thrill of driving at twice the legal speed limit (as Edward had promised never to tell our parents), I didn't enjoy it quite so much when I wasn't the one in control of the vehicle at the time.

I stumbled off the back of the bike, and pulled off the helmet. He was waiting for me though he didn't say anything as we walked side by side up to the diner's door. He paused a step inside the door, apparently checking to see if he recognized anyone. After a sweep of the room's occupants he seemed satisfied that this was a safe enough place for him to talk without being overheard. We sat down in the furthest corner booth facing each other. Jasper glared at the approaching waitress, making her hesitate, then think better of her actions and walk away again.

'Well,' I said after the waitress had bolted, 'Explanations. Please.' Jasper, who was currently turned towards the window next to us, looked slowly at me out of the corner of his eye. I bit my lip, not sure what to say next. Jasper dropped his gaze then folded his arms on the table, leaning forward.

'I...never thought I would tell another person what I'm about to try and pass off as a miserable justification for my inexcusable behaviour towards you.' I was holding my breath, waiting for him to go on. 'My life before I came to Forks isn't generally known by anyone here, save for Rosalie, or else I would never stay here. I don't want anyone to know...I was so weak back then. So insecure and...' His hands which were pressed against his arms turned into fists. 'In my first year of highschool I was very young and naive. I had always been popular I guess, accepted. Everyone wanted to be around me... But then once highschool started I began to attract the attention of an older girl. She was 17 years to my 14 and stunning. At the time I was flattered to be so singled out. We started dating barely a week after the school year had started - I was the envy of every other boy in my year. Ha...the older ones knew better than to envy me though, they had known her longer.' He paused to scowl out the window for a few moments before continuing.

'Me and...this girl, we were together for barely four months, the typical teenage romance. But during that time we - well, I was inseparable. I was completely devoted, I was a puppy on a leash, it was pathetic now looking back at how much influence she had over me. I rearranged my whole life to centre around her, even dropped the friends she didn't like. I was innocent enough to believe that she saw our relationship the same way as I did. I wanted it to last forever, I truly believed I was in love. Then she decided it was time to move on to her next victim. She had gotten her pretty boy for the semester, now it was time to move on to something fresh and new. She broke it off over the winter holidays. I couldn't believe it, I was devastated. I was so blind I hadn't even seen it coming, even though Rose was always saying she was taking advantage of me. Actually... lots of people tried to tell me. But I ignored them, told them I knew what I was doing. I trusted her. I would have done anything for her.'

He hesitated for a moment, considering something. '...I _did _do anything for her...' His voice was a whisper by the end. 'I was convinced that the break up was just a temporary glitch and everything would be sorted out once school started again. But the first day back I didn't see her all morning - until at lunch I walked out of class to find her all but making out with a classmate of mine. She didn't even look at me though I was standing there staring. In that moment, my fragile and stupid little world shattered. I had never felt so much pain. It was only afterwards that I began to finally realise it was not just the pain of losing her, but finally admitting to myself that I had been such a fool in the first place. I barely made it through the rest of the school day... I barely made it through the next 24 hours... That night I was so convinced that my life had no more meaning left in it.'

I tried to hide my very quiet gasp but he must have heard anyway. I was pretty sure I knew what he had tried to do next - the realisation that he always wore long sleeved shirts suddenly kicked in. Of course.

'That night...I didn't even try to think of how my life had been before her. I didn't even try and stop myself. I waited until midnight then...tried to...' He didn't seem to be able to finish his sentence. 'Rose found me - she...had been watching me like a hawk ever since she heard the news and she had a pretty good idea of what was going on inside my head. I decided to...do it while listening to 'our' song. How wonderfully cliché I think, looking back. Anyway, Rose heard it playing and guessed what was up. She caught me and called an ambulance right away, but not before I had, well, half done the job. ...That's why I can't stand the sight of blood anymore. You know that day, when you hurt yourself in class, I was only trying to find a way not to break down right in front of you. I didn't know how long I could keep the flashbacks locked up and I really didn't feel like finding my limit. Leaving was the only thing I could think of. It's been more than two years since, but I still try to avoid being close to people. I was ashamed of letting any one person have so much control over me, I never wanted even the mere possibility of it ever happening again.'

'Though I guess one good thing that came out of all this was that I learned to be myself, not accept what others tried to change in me. I went through so much gossip and stares before I left, that eventually I didn't give a damn what anyone else said about me, even after I came to Forks. I ignored their gossip. I changed from always fitting in without even thinking about it, to purposely trying my hardest to be different from everyone else, mostly to try and avoid people, I suppose. Unfortunately even that didn't give me the space I wanted and I would have to make it very obvious I did not want the company - as I'm sure you've heard the horror stories from Jessica and such. Then I met you. You and your completely irresistible personality.'

A suddenly playful half grin appeared on his face, surprising me in the serious atmosphere. 'I couldn't help wanting to talk to you. Then I realised I was letting myself slip over the lines and rules I had set up and followed so carefully...until you. I was too afraid to find out what might happen if I dropped all my defences, so I'd swear to myself I wouldn't be around you anymore. But then I would give in and talk to you without even thinking about it. Then I'd hate myself for leading you on and promise not to do it again...'

He sounded quietly furious now, though I wasn't sure if it was directed at me or himself. 'It went round and round in my head. I couldn't think straight with you nearby anymore. Rose must have thought I was going to have to go back into rehab or something, I was so restless.' He gave another half smile and shook his head, looking back out the window.

I felt numb. My heart was racing and I was on edge from hearing someone else's pain so clearly.

I didn't know what to say. What I really wanted to do was to go over and wrap my arms around him, but I couldn't. Not yet. He turned back to face me. 'I don't even know why I'm telling you all this. I... I guess it means I've give up trying to be that me.'

'This all explains so much...' I murmured.

'I guess it does, doesn't it. At least now maybe you won't think I'm a completely antisocial jerk.' He chuckled looking at my still stunned face. His expression changed when mine didn't. His eyes grew dark and his smile slipped away. He sighed. 'Never mind. I guess you must probably think I'm a freak now, don't you?' He shook his head, a look of defeat on his face, then started to get up to leave.

I reached out and grabbed his hand across the table before he could stand. He hesitated when I twisted my fingers through his. 'Please don't go.' My voice came out half cracked. I quickly cleared my throat. 'Please, I don't think you're a freak at all. Thank you for telling me all that...for you know, letting me in. Thank you for - for deciding to change your rules. I appreciate it.' I was trying to tell him that I wanted to be with him too if that's what he wanted - in a very tangled way that is. The usual me.

'Are you saying...you still want to try being friends?' he asked, a little wide eyed with surprise. He sat down again, our hands still intertwined on the table. I took a deep breath - I might as well confess now and get it over with.

'Actually, I was hoping we could be...a little more than just friends?' It was question, not a statement - it could only happen if he also wanted it. (Ok, to tell the truth I'm not really one for long mushy stares, but this was a rare exception.) Our eyes met and I just could not look away. He seemed to be trying to find a hint of doubt or sarcasm in my face. Obviously he was unsuccessful. 'Are you sure that's...what you really want?' he asked tentatively, 'I can't make any promises to change. I come as I am...damaged goods so to speak,' he added ironically.

I shook my head, 'I don't care. I think you're perfect just as you are.'

He chuckled. 'Perfect?' he scoffed, 'I hardly think I'm _that_.'

'I do, so tough luck. You'll just have to deal with it.'

'Oh come on, that's as ridiculous as someone calling you normal,' he teased, waving a hand towards me.

'Keep fussing and I'll just have to keep on calling you perfect,' I declared.

Jasper folded his arms, pretending to be mad. 'Geez, you're such a little monster, aren't you?'

'Yup,' I agreed cheerfully, 'Proud of it.'

'I can tell.' Then he sighed and said, 'Come on, let's go. I think the waitress is beginning to stare.' 'Probably just at your _perfect _gorgeousness but yeah, I agree we should head back now.' He rolled his eyes at me, but didn't argue further this time.

We walked slowly together back to the bike. He climbed on and handed me the helmet again, this time with a smile. I grinned and tugged it on. 'I'll get helmet hair,' I complained teasingly. 'Well better than anything happening to that smug little smirk of yours,' he replied, revving the engine. 'Smirk?!' I protested, 'This is a well earned victory grin, I'll have you know. It's completely different!' He just shook his head in exasperation of my madness and told me to hold on tight.

I wrapped my arms tightly around his waist again, this time daring to rest my head against his shoulder as we sped back along the forest swamped road to town. I was perfectly happy except I felt that the helmet was keeping too much distance between us.

The helmet. Something suddenly clicked in my mind and all my dread from early in the day came flooding back. Jasper always wore this helmet when he was out on his bike. But in the visions it was different, he hadn't been wearing it - I would remember, I had seen it so many times by now. So why wouldn't he have been wearing it when he crashed in the future?

Because I was wearing it. Because I was the cause of the accident. I was the crucial factor in some slight way, placing him at just the right time and space for it to happen. The more I had interfered, had tried to 'save' him by trying to be friends so I could warn him had only pushed this piece of the future into sharper and surer focus.

My heart had just flown into full out panic mode when I looked up to see something large and brown go flying across the road just in front of us. I felt Jasper swing the bike around violently in a 180 degree turn under me in a split second attempt to avoid hitting whatever it was before we skidded out of control down the centre of the road, flinging pieces of gravel everywhere. Everything moved so fast I barely had time to catch my breath. Then the front tire hit a pot hole in the road and flipped up, sending us both flying before the bike finally fell on it's side with a crash and the sound of crunching gravel against metal.

My right side ended up feeling the majority of my impact with the road. I was also fairly positive I would have been knocked unconscious the first time my head met the ground had it not been protected by the helmet. It was however enough to make me see stars and thoroughly disorient me.

The chaos of the crash and my journey along the pavement finally came to a stop. I couldn't move at first, my breathing was far too painful and I couldn't think straight. When I opened my eyes, I was lying on my back, staring up at the tree top edged sky above me. Everything had a slightly surreal look to it because the shaded visor distorted all the colours.

I'm not entirely sure what happened next. I was told later that the car travelling behind us had seen a deer race across the road in front of us, and then us go out of control trying to avoid hitting it. They had called an ambulance straight away. I remember someone's face directly above mine, asking me something I don't remember. I didn't really listen - my scrambled mind was far too concerned about finding out how Jasper was.

I felt I wasn't in too bad of shape (a notion I would reconsider later when I tried to stand) even with my head protected, so Jasper had to be worse off. One of the occupants of the car who had stopped to help us refused to let me up in case I had hurt my spine so I had no way of finding out. I was worried out of my mind. I couldn't see to the side because the helmet blocked my vision and my neck send shooting pains whenever I tried to move it.

I couldn't figure out what was going on. More people appeared, paramedics I suppose because I felt myself being secured onto a stretcher. No one answered any of my questions, but then again I couldn't really be sure that I had said them out loud or just screamed them in my head. The last thing I remember was being loaded into the ambulance and catching a glimpse of Jasper, still on the ground and surrounded by two or three people in dark blue uniforms.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9: **

I woke up to the sound of a squeaking trolley being wheeled past my open door. Everything seemed too bright even with my eyes closed and I could feel the beginnings of a killer headache coming on. A machine of some sort was beeping at an irritatingly high pitch nearby. Something stung my arm, a distraction from the realisation that my entire body ached. My breathing was slower than usual and even then, painful on one side. One of my hands was resting on the side of me that ached the most so I worked up the brain power to decide to move it. The second I did, someone said my name. They sounded very close.

I decided to risk opening my eyes. Edward's face appeared barely a foot away, concerned but relieved at the same time. 'Alice! You're awake! Finally! How do you feel? Can you hear me?' He sounded tired and stressed out and anxious. Wait, _finally_ awake?

'Yeah...yeah, I'm great... Fabulous. How long was I out for?' I mumbled.

'A couple of hours because of the crash, but then they had to keep you sedated longer so they could fix up your ribs and stuff...' He trailed off. Clearly the last day had been hell for him. I struggled to sit up against my pillows - my side burned at the slightest movement. Edward reached over to help me.

'Hey, I'm fine now, don't worry,' I protested.

'Alice you can't even move,' he said rolling his eyes.

'But I can still annoy you, what more do I need?' I teased, trying to distract him from his worrying. A grinned crept over his features.

'And how exactly do you plan on doing that if you can't even get up?'

'Oh I can still talk. I could just tell Bella a few insignificant details about you, like that time when we were at the carnival when we were nine and you were so scared of the clowns you started cry-' 'Say one more word on that particular moment in history and you are dead meat!' he cut me off, obviously forgetting my fragile condition for a few seconds. He looked positively horrified that I remembered this particularly embarrassing moment of his existence. I laughed even though it hurt. 'What's stopping me?'

'Um, a dozen nurses and wires?'

'I could always call her on my cell phone?'

'What if I move it just out of your reach?' He jokingly stuck his tongue out at me and snatched my red mobile phone off my bedside table.

'I could always tie you up with my IV cables and trip you before you reached the door, drag you back and confiscate it?'

'Yeah, but what if you can't throw the IV cables over me in the first place?'

'Hmm...' Admittedly, he was right. I probably didn't have the necessary arm strength to throw anything right now. 'Well, Bella will be round to visit me anyway so I don't even need my phone.' So ha, I thought.

He glowered at me now. 'You wouldn't tell her that. ...Would you?'

I smiled innocently. 'Depends...' 'On what?' 'On you being my unconditional slave during my time as prisoner here?' I suggested.

'Okay fine, if you insist.' 'Oh I do... You can start by giving me back my cell.' 'Why? I thought you said you wouldn't...' he asked suspiciously. 'No I just need to let everyone else from school know I'm fine. I'll bet they're worried.' He measured my sweet, innocent expression for a moment, then relinquished it to me with a pout. I texted a couple of people then snapped the phone shut.

'Any more demands, milady?' Edward asked teasingly.

'Um yeah actually, now that I think of it... How's Jasper? Where is he? Is he okay? He must be ten times worse than me... And it was all my fault too! I need to apologize...what room is he in? Can I go see him? Is he going to be alright?!' I was nearly hysterical by the end of my sudden flood of questions. Much to my surprise, Edward's face closed up and he looked away to glare out the hospital window. 'What? What is it? Is it bad? Edward! Tell me!'

'Jasper's going to be fine...well relatively speaking-' 'What?! "_Relatively_"? What the hell does that mean? Is he hurt that badly?'

'Alice calm down, you'll hurt yourself even more. He'll be fine, I suppose a bit worse off than you, though it's not like it's anything he didn't deserve-'

I was suddenly livid. 'Edward! What the hell do you mean Jasper deserved to get hurt?!'

I remembered quite clearly everything Jasper had told me before the accident and I did not believe that Jasper deserved any more pain than he had already gone through. Edward's eyes were fierce as he explained. 'Alice, just look at yourself! He could have killed you! I think I have at least some right to be angry.'

'No you don't! It was _an accident_, Edward. If you say one word to him that I wouldn't approve of, then you are beyond dead. I mean it.' The guilty look he tried to hide gave him away. 'You already told him your views, didn't you?' My voice was quiet but still furious for a tiny person.

'Hey! The person I love the most on this planet nearly died because of him! Do you think I would let him off the hook that easily?' he tried to defend himself. Sadly I was past wanting to hear any excuses. I knew Edward loved me but it did not in any way justify making Jasper feel deathly guilty over an _accident_, not on top of everything else.

'What were you doing with him anyway?' Edward's latest question came out as more curious than angry.

'Do I have to explain everything? We were just talking,' I snapped, all of my patience lost for now.

'Talking on a speeding motorbike out on the highway?' he clarified, raising an eyebrow skeptically. 'Yes. Got a problem with that?'

'Not yet...'

'Arg! You are so impossible. Ok, I will deal with you later, I need to go talk to Jasper right now.'

'Oh no you don't, you're not walking anywhere for a while,' he assured me, folding his arms in disagreement.

'Then you either A) take me to him somehow that does not involve me walking, or B) bring him to my room. And I mean right now. Slave for my imprisonment, remember? You promised.'

Edward growled under his breath but gave in. 'Fine! Just this once. Whatever, we'll probably both get into really big trouble for this you know.'

'Does it look like I really care? Now spring me.' He unclipped the sensor from my finger and I pulled off the plastic tube from under my nose. I was conscious now, I didn't really need it anyway. The monitors started to flash as soon as the sensor was no longer connected to my pulse so I figured we had very little time before a nurse would be alerted and would come in to check on me. Edward hesitated for a moment as he twisted the IV cables between his fingers. I was all for yanking them straight out, but I didn't think Edward would stand for that. Instead I reached up and yanked the pair of squishy clear liquid bags off their hook and tossed them into my lap. 'Okay let's go!'

Edward looked like he might argue again, but then scooped me up in his arms and hurried out the door. I glanced over his shoulder to check no one saw us heading down the pale green hallway. (To tell the truth, I had never liked that shade of hospital green. It looked like a very unhealthy colour, not exactly inspiring to get better again.) We rounded a corner and Edward adjusted his hold on me so he could reach the door handle. 'I would like to talk to him alone, alright?' I said quietly as we paused before the door.

My brother sighed and nodded. 'I'll be back after half an hour though if for some miraculous reason no one has found out yet. It's not good for you to be moving around yet.' I couldn't help smiling, 'Now what would I do without my over protective, over-bearing brother?'

Edward chuckled. 'I really do dread to think...' Then he slowly opened the door.


	10. Chapter 10

**(Credit for lyrics used in this chapter goes to Tokio Hotel. If you are bored, look them up, they are amazing...) **

**Chapter 10:**

Jasper was lying in his bed, eyes closed, perfectly still. There was a painful edge to his features even though he must have been asleep. Edward very gently set me down so I was sitting on the edge of the bed then left me alone. I studied Jasper's face before he woke. There were shallow but angry red scrapes down one side of his cheek and along his right temple. There were purple shadows under his eyes as if he hadn't slept in days. Despite this he still looked unbearably perfect. Then I wondered what exactly Edward had said to him, exactly how much damage had been done...

His eyes flickered a few times before focussing on me. I breathed a sigh of relief. 'Hey,' I whispered. 'Hey.' We stared at each other a little awkwardly for another moment or two before I couldn't help blurting out, 'You look like hell.' Jasper grinned and rolled his eyes. 'Feel like it too,' he said as he slowly sat up. 'So what's your injury score?' I asked, trying to keep my face casual while really I was dreading the answer. He shrugged and didn't answer - he probably didn't want to worry me so I had to assess the damage myself.

His one leg was in a cast and I could see the beginning of a line of bruises at the edge of his shirt sleeve that probably worked their way all the way up to his shoulder. He wouldn't really go into detail about the rest of his injuries when I asked again. I expect he wanted to hear more about me. 'Your brother said it was pretty bad-' 'He was exaggerating. I'm fine, don't worry,' I tried to assure him.

He looked me up and down before giving me a doubtful look. I rethought my last statement. 'Well, I _will be _fine. Promise.' He still looked miserable. I could tell he was blaming himself entirely. I shifted slowly so I could lean against the pillows next to him. He put his arm around my shoulders, pulling me against his side. I gently rested my head on his shoulder, hoping I wouldn't put pressure on any of his extensive injuries. We sat like that for a while - I concentrated on keeping my breathing pain free and listening to Jasper's steady heart rate.

'I'm sorry,' he said eventually. His voice seemed very quiet compared to the sharp beeping of the monitor. 'Don't be. It wasn't your fault.' I wished so hard that there was someway I could explain that it had really been my fault, but it seemed impossible without sounding crazy. (Maybe I should get myself out of the hospital first? Make it a little bit harder for them to catch me when the truth finally did get out...) We were silent for a minute longer before Jasper tried to talk again. 'No. It was my fault...if I hadn't been going so fast. If I had been paying more attention - I should never have taken you out there. It was the worst thing I've ever done...'

I felt my entire chest burn as soon as he said those words. 'No,' I choked out, 'No, don't say that. Don't ever say that.' It was so far from the worst thing he had ever done. It was the best thing for me whether or not he would ever believe that. I had finally seen the other side of him, I could finally say I knew him. And there was no personal cost which I would not have paid to be able to understand Jasper the way I did now.

'No Alice, this is the worst thing I ever done...hurting you-' 'Hey,' I snapped , annoyed now, 'I will not tolerate moping.' I turned towards him, pointing a finger threatening at him - it was all I was capable of at that point, what with my ability to be intimidating so drastically limited. He raised his eyebrows and pouted further, clearly amused now.

'Hey I'm serious! Don't make me come over there!'

'And what? Poke me to death?' He chuckled at my menacing expression. I paused to reconsider my plans - he was kind of right...

'Well I could always try.'

'Good luck with that. The nurse might catch you before you finish the job. Or you may run out of energy. That's a lot of pokes and I don't think you're up for any strenuous activity like that just yet.' I gave him my best death glare.

'Ok, you asked for it. Don't make me bring in my army of slaves to do the job for me!'

'Army of slaves, eh? Now that sounds interesting, I'd love to know how exactly you acquired those. Brain washing or blackmail?'

'I'm glad you think so highly of me! Actually, it's mostly just my brother who agreed to-' Jasper's expression flipped from joking to bleak in an instant at the mention of Edward. 'Ah.'

'Ah what?' I could feel we were about to enter dangerous ground, 'What did Edward say to you? ...Jasper, please, tell me.'

'Guess I already broke a rule...'

'What? What rules? What did he say?!' I was getting seriously annoyed now. _Rules?_ What on earth did Edward _do_?

'Well,' Jasper began in sheepish voice, 'He said he didn't want me associating with you ever again and-' 'WHAT?!' 'Well you have to admit he was pretty mad, and I don't blame him after what happened. I think he's a tad more reasonable now.' 'STILL!' 'Calm down, Alice.' 'No! Who does he think he is, saying things like that! Don't pay attention to a word he says!' 'He's your twin brother. I almost killed you. Of course he has a right to be upset with me.' I couldn't argue any further, so I folded my arms and glared at the wall. 'It's not like it's that bad of a thing. I'm sure he'll mellow out enough to give me visiting hours,' Jasper joked, trying to lift my cloud-of-death mood.

'That's just the problem. I don't ever want to be away from you...' I whispered, my eyes still fixed on the wall. Jasper was silent for moment then, 'Really? You still want me around? Even after all this?'

'Always.'

'Even though I landed you in here?'

'Yes.'

'And even after I was a total jerk to you for ages?'

'Yup.'

'Are you sure?'

'Definitely.'

'...Ok, don't lie - how hard did you hit your head, Alice?'

'Right, NOW you are in trouble!' I snapped, snatching the pillow from behind me and smacking Jasper in the head with it. I grinned evilly as he stared at me in astonishment of my sudden attack. I raised the pillow again and he put his arms out to defend himself. 'No moping, ok? Promise or I will beat you to death with a pile of feathers!' I warned.

'There are no feathers in hospital pillows, Alice.' 'I don't care! I will beat you to death with this synthetic fabric stuffed rectangle!'

'Ok fine, I solemnly swear not to mope,' he promised, 'Just no more beating me up! I might pop a stitch!'

I hadn't thought about that. I dropped the pillow and was at his side immediately. 'Seriously? Are you ok? I didn't actually hurt you, did I?' I demanded, concern colouring my words. Jasper didn't respond - instead he suddenly slumped back against his pillows with closed eyes. 'Jasper...' He didn't move. Ohmigod. Did I _actually_ hurt him? I was a little bit scared now. 'Jasper! Are you alright! Say something!' I asked frantically, gently shaking his shoulder. I leaned over him, his face inches away. He still didn't open his eyes. 'Jasper? Please, love, wake up...' I begged. I was about to resort to calling a nurse when his eyes flicked open.

'Boo! ...Gotcha,' he smirked. He has just been teasing me. I gapped at him. I had been completely fooled (and was probably never going to hear the end of this).

'Silly! You know you're really quite adorable when you're freaking out?' he chuckled when I didn't say anything.

'That...was...not...fair!' I finally stammered, 'I actually thought!-' 'At least I know I could always make it as a convincing actor now,' he mused, ignoring my still shocked and somewhat outraged expression. I pouted and fixed my best glare on him.

'Oh come on now Alice, it was just a joke.' I refused to exit pout mode. '...Please Alice, am I forgiven?' _No way_, I thought furiously. Then he brushed the edge of my jaw gently with the back of his hand, bringing me back to the reality of just how close we were. I shook my head, determined not to give in. He caught my face with one hand, his sea green eyes opening wide. 'Pleaaaaaase?' he whispered.

Now_ that _was just playing dirty - there was no way I could resist that, not in a million years. 'Well. Um...Ok...if I have to...' I tried to sound unimpressed, but I could feel my heart melting as I said the words. I blinked a few times, feeling somewhat dazed. His hand slipped down to my neck and I unconsciously leaned closer.

Unfortunately we were rudely interrupted by the door banging open loudly and a nurse marched in carrying a very large and frightening looking syringe. Time to go. I scrambled into a sitting position and smiled as innocently as possible. Sadly, the nurse didn't buy it at all. She was annoyed with me, to say the least. I was promptly returned to my room and given a stern lecture about over exerting myself before my ribs had the chance to heal. She probably also wanted to add a few choice words about what I may have been doing with Jasper but she managed to suppress it. There wasn't much I could do to protest really. I had managed to get my half hour alone with Jasper, plus now that I was no longer distracted by his presence, the pain was starting to set in again. Or maybe it was just the painkillers wearing off.

I didn't feel like I could handle any more walking upright today either way, though I was pretty sure Edward was probably going to be guarding my door with an axe from now on just in case. Oh well. Brothers, what can you do? I was promptly returned to my bed and re-hooked up to all the irritating devices and needles. The nurse took my temperature and pulse and then fussed over fixing my IVs. I looked away when she slid a new needle under the skin of my arm. Ugh. There were only so many sharp things you can poke into one arm already. A line from one of my favourite songs came back to me as I lay there, lost in thought while trying to ignore the nurse._ Can feel the pulse...in our veins, so weak today... _At that moment it felt so true. Both me and Jasper were hardly fighting fit this day and the constant beeping of the machine reminded me of the meds I was under the influence of. I could hear my heart slow with every infuriatingly loud beep even as I felt the sedatives kick in and sink me slowly into unconsciousness.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11: **

It turned out I would be stuck in the hospital's steely grasp for the next week. No amount of pleading, whining, bribery or flirting with the doctors could change their minds. Apparently I had a total of two cracked ribs and small but painful fracture in my shoulder. Now that I was awake and attempting to escape, I had a sling to keep my right arm immobile while my shoulder took it's sweet time to set and heal. Luckily I had no serious broken bones and all my limbs were intact.

Jasper on the other hand would be walking with a cast for several weeks more. He had also ended up with a concussion, whereas I had managed to escape the head trauma. (Edward of course started the jokes about my not even having that as an excuse for my behaviour now) All in all, we would live but had a fairly substantial list of injuries between the pair of us. I hadn't asked how the bike had faired yet - I didn't think Edward would have a very positive response for the reason behind my near death experience. If the bike_ had_ still been in one piece after the accident (which I very much doubted), I'm pretty sure he would have taken a flame thrower to it as soon as possible.

While Edward tried his best to keep me entertained for my confinement to my hospital bed (and countless cables), I was bored to tears by the end of the fourth day. I was restless and sick of watching TV. Even worse, Jasper and I couldn't go see each other because of our bans on movement. And Edward sure as hell was not going to go ferrying me back to see him - he had no plans to encourage our seeing each other any time soon.

So I guess you could say I was suffering from heart trauma also. The longer me and Jasper were apart, the more listless I became. I began having nightmares about the accident every night which I refused to confess to anyone. In my dreams, I kept reliving the crash on fast forward mode. I knew what was coming in the dream so I always had extra time to panic and start screaming at Jasper to stop, but of course he never heard me. Then Jasper always seemed to disappear the moment the bike went down leaving me alone until I woke up crying. Eventually they began to wear on me and I became scared to fall asleep.

* * * *

It was my last day in 'prison' and I had finally refused all forms of sedatives from the nurse for the night. I was determined not to sleep if I could help it - ok, ok so my judgement was a little off by this point, but who could blame me? I lay staring at my dark ceiling for what felt like hours, listening to the occasional foot steps and shadows that passed the light under my door. I must have fallen asleep at some point because I was woken up when I accidentally hit my good arm against my bedside table when I reached out to break my fall in my nightmare. The impact startled me fully awake and I sat up feeling shaken. My heart felt like it was going a million beats a minute and I couldn't push the snap shot like images of the nightmare out of my mind. My stupid ribs burned so I fell back against my pillows, muttering various profanities. A few minutes passed and I still couldn't calm down. I was almost desperate enough to try calling either a nurse or Edward but I knew it was late and they probably wouldn't appreciate it.

I started to get unreasonably mad. How the hell was I suppose to distract myself while in this stupid room anyway? It was just like a cell. Plain white walls and safety standard furniture. Mind numbing. I needed to get out. Then another thought popped into my head. Maybe go for a walk? It seemed like a great idea at the time. I always went out for a walk to think when something was bothering me back home. My room was still pitch black so I had to fumble around with the cables for a bit before I was free.

I wandered over to my door and opened it cautiously, half expecting a nurse to be waiting right outside for me for some strange reason. Clearly I was not thinking straight. It was late enough that all the lights on my floor had been turned out in the halls and all the curtains were closed. A few doors had a faint glow coming out from under them which I was careful to avoid in case there were nurses in them who could come out and catch me and send me straight back to my white prison room. A clock on the wall read just after 1am. I wandered down the halls randomly, not really planning where I was going, just glad to be out and moving and alone. Of course multiple parts of me protested loudly to my walking but I ignored them for now - there were still enough painkillers in my system to allow me to do that.

The hospital seemed to go on forever, but then again I may have looped back a couple of times. Everything looked the same and I wasn't really paying attention. I walked around slowly, gathering my thoughts and building a thick a wall as possible in mind between me and the nightmares. I had finally decided to try and head back to my room when something caught my eye. A bright red glowing sign. 'Exit', it read. Hmm. An exit might not be so bad right now. I walked closer. Only for emergencies: Roof exit. Roof? If I went outside, I would be able to see the stars. That was an attractive proposition right then - stars were a good distraction in my book. I pushed the bar on the door and it clicked open.

The hospital roof was quite plain - a flat, colourless concrete that seemed to stretch on forever. The night's sky was partially clear and it was chilly. Wishing that I had thought to bring a jacket or something, I sat down carefully on the slightly damp surface. I tucked my knees up under my chin and gazed upwards, trying to pick out the few constellations I actually knew.

I was distracted by someone calling my name from somewhere behind me. I looked over my shoulder to see a long blond haired figure standing in the exit doorway. 'Alice?' It was Rosalie and she sounded confused. I watched her distinctively perfect silhouette pick it's way across the cold roof towards me.

She stopped at my side and sat down. 'Alice? Are you alright, honey?' I had to think for a second or two there. _Was_ I ok? I had managed to walk out most of my restlessness by now and I would probably be able to sleep. I guess that qualified me as ok.

'Yes,' I answered truthfully, looking up at her.

'Then what are you doing out here?' she asked gently.

I shrugged, 'Bored? I couldn't sleep.' But what was she doing here at this time of night anyway? Shouldn't she have gone home by now? I wondered. 'Why are you still here? It's so late.'

'I was with Jasper. He couldn't sleep either and we were talking. I heard someone walk by the room a couple of times. Then I was about to leave - I opened the door and I saw you walk out the roof exit of all places! Of course I was going to follow you.'

'Oh...ok then.'

Rosalie examined my vaguely puzzled expression for another moment before she stood back up and offered me a hand up. 'Come on, let's go back inside. You're going to freeze out here.' I stumbled back to my feet and she put her arm around my shoulders and led me back inside.

She took me back to my room and sat down on the edge of my bed. 'Are you going to be alright now, Alice? I can stay if you want. If you've got stuff on your mind or anything?...' She looked worried about me. I was surprised - we hadn't really talked much before, but she seemed genuinely concerned. She was also the opposite of Edward in that she seemed to approve of me and Jasper. I slumped back against my pillows, so tired all of a sudden, but Rosalie made no move to leave. I decided talking a little bit longer couldn't hurt.

'How's Jasper?' I asked, remembering what she had just said about him not being able to sleep either. 'He's fine, just worrying about you mostly.' 'Really?'_ I thought it was just me that worried uncontrollably..._ 'What does he worry about?' I mumbled, sleepier now. Rosalie was silent for a while, as if debating whether or not to tell me the truth. 'Mostly if you're hiding being mad at him for the accident. He thinks you're only saying that you forgive him because you feel sorry for him. And he's kind of...scared you might change your mind about wanting to be around him...that you'll sort of decide he's crazy after all?'

Her last statement came out more like a question and it was clear that she was worrying about the same things on behalf of her brother's happiness. 'I don't mean to make you worry more or put pressure on you or anything, Alice. I just thought you might want to know what he was thinking...knowing is so helpful sometimes...' She paused, distracted by some private thought for a moment. I couldn't help yawning. I felt so sleepy now...

'Tell him not to worry...I'm not gonna leave him...and I'm fine...really...' I yawned again. 'I guess I should let you sleep now.' She stood up to leave. 'Rosalie?' I murmured before she reached the door. 'Yes?' 'Before you go... Can you tell Jasper I love him for me?' I was practically asleep and I wasn't sure if she heard me. 'I will,' she answered before she slipped out the door. It sounded like she was smiling when she said it.

* * * *

We were leaving the hospital today. Finally. It had been over a week and now we were going to be freed. I had to be very careful about moving and had a strict ban on just about any type of physical activity you could think of except for walking and sitting down. Jasper was in a similar state with a cast on one leg and just as many little bottles of pain killer and antibiotics as me. We both made numerous cracks about carry them all around in lunch bags and snacking on them at school.

I was almost (_almost_) a little bit sad to be leaving. Mine and Jasper's hospital rooms had become very familiar along with the vulture like nurses. I would especially miss Edward as my unconditional slave. That promise ended the second I walked out the front doors, loosely meaning he was going to become a hell of a lot more overprotective and a lot less accommodating of Jasper's presence.

I suppose I couldn't really blame him for thinking the way he did, because there were so many things I couldn't exactly tell him the truth about - either they weren't my secrets to share, or I would end up straight back where I came from.

Actually, now that I thought about it, I hadn't had any more visions since the crash. This was a strange realisation - had they finally stopped or just a temporary lapse? Either way, it was a restful break. Maybe the medications were just blocking them from my mind? I guess I would find out sooner or later.

I met Jasper in the hallway on crutches and with Rosalie at his side. She gave me a tentative smile. I still wasn't entirely sure how she felt about me. She seemed to be glad of my presence but she was still a little bit distant with me - maybe it was just the gap in our ages. At least there was none of the flat out resentment that Edward saved for Jasper. As much as I had tried to reason with him, calmly persuade him or threaten him with instant death, he still would not give up his dislike towards Jasper. Although my presence managed to suppress it most of the time, I dreaded to think what might happen if I left the pair of them alone together for any period of time.

I had also begun to wonder (in all my long hours of staring at the hospital ceiling, listening to the monitor) whether or not jealousy had anything had to do with it. Edward had always filled the role of the most important male in my life, up until now. I wondered if he felt his position was being challenged if I ended up having a serious boyfriend. Or maybe it was just his over protective older brother side surfacing out of instinct. Either way wasn't helping me.

I went to Jasper's other side and together we made our way out to the front lobby. Carlisle and Esme were waiting for me, along with Edward who was carrying my bag for me. (Ok so there were perks to having brothers after all) Luckily my adoptive parents didn't seem to have the same problem with Jasper as Edward did and they were friendly as we all walked out the hospital doors together. I had noticed that Esme and Rosalie seemed to get along particularly well. They had spent many of their hours over the last week in the hospital caf chatting together.

'Mmmm sunshine, finally. I haven't been outside in forever. It's such a relief to finally be going home,' I commented as we walked slowly across the car park. We had been having a patch of rare sunny days this last week and it had been killer for me to have to stay confined inside.

'You'd better start working on that tan now,' Edward teased me, 'You're so pale now, people are going start thinking you're a zombie.'

'Or a vampire,' Jasper countered.

'I think I'll take being a vampire over a zombie any day, thanks Edward. Not exactly flattering to be a wandering around confused and eating people. Not at all my style.'

'Fine, fine. Vampire if you wish.'

'Does that mean I can go around biting people now?' I asked cheerfully.

'Well it's not like that's something you wouldn't do anyway...you're just weird like that naturally.'

'Oh gee thanks, Edward. You're doing wonders for my image here,' I pretended to grumble.

'Hey, you never know with you - you might...' he said with a chuckle. I smirked at him, then bared my teeth in a poor imitation of fangs. 'Hey don't bite me now! You have to be a good vampire.'

'A _good _vampire? What does that entail exactly?'

'...Um, not biting people?'

'Then what will I survive off of?' I countered.

'Tomato juice?'

'Great... I don't even _like_ tomato juice. Being a vampire isn't all it's cracked up to be.'

'It's ok Alice, you can have my blood,' Jasper added in my defence, although he was probably extremely amused at me and brother's bizarre conversation topic. He would soon learn we were always like this, if not worse. 'Thanks Jazz,' I glanced over to grin at to him.

We reached Carlisle's black Mercedes and Esme opened the passenger door, pausing to help me in.

'Just a sec,' I said. Carlisle and Edward got in while I turned to face Jasper. Rosalie's car was parked directly opposite from ours and she had left her brother for a minute to go unlock it. I looked up at Jasper's face, still scratched down one side, but still so unbearable perfect...

I bit my lip - I didn't want to say goodbye. Who knew how long it would be before we could see each other again? (Or how long before Edward decided to install an electric fence around the house?)

Jasper's arms wound around me and pulled me close. I buried my face in his chest and tried very hard not to cry. I didn't care that my family was probably watching, or that we were standing in the middle of the road. All I cared about was not ever letting go of Jasper. Eventually though the moment had to come and he very gently pulled away from me. He lifted my chin with one finger so that he could examine my dejected expression.

Finally I met his eyes and he smiled my favourite heart stopping smile. Then quickly but ever so gently he closed the gap between us. I suppose I should have been a little annoyed to having an audience to our first kiss, but I couldn't quite bring myself to care at that point. The kiss ended all too soon. 'I'll see you soon,' he whispered in my ear, then kissed my forehead.

We both returned to our respective cars. Carlisle backed out and I twisted in my seat to watch Jasper disappear behind me. It was only after we drove away that I realised Jasper had slipped a piece of paper into my hand - I tucked it carefully into my pocket, deciding I would look at it later when I was alone.

I leaned my head against the window as we drove home. It was quiet the entire time - no one seem to dare to say anything. After we got home (finally, finally), Edward helped me inside and up the stairs to my room. He looked like he wanted to say something but I told him to leave. Pleased to have my own bed back, I collapsed in a heap on it and pulled out the note Jasper had slipped me. It was a small square of paper with five words scrawled across it.

_PS. I love you too. _

I couldn't fight the enormous smile spreading across my face. Then I giggled. First just once, then several more times. I couldn't stop. I felt so light and fluffy I could have been on the cover of a romance novel. Maybe things weren't so bad after all...


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12: **

It was twelve hours later and I couldn't sleep. I had been laying there, staring at my ceiling for nearly three hours now. It not due to pain from my injuries. It was much more my separation from Jasper that made my entire chest ache until I wanted to curl into a tight ball. (Actually I ended up trying that to see if it would help. It didn't.)

Giving up eventually, I shoved back the covers and sat up. I hadn't bothered to close my curtains and I could see the neighbour's front porch lights shining in faintly.

_Screw this_, I muttered to myself as I jumped off my bed and went over to the window. I stared out into the blackness for a few minutes, contemplating. I could go out. I could walk the 15 minutes to Jasper's house. I could see him and stop the pain I was feeling for maybe just a short while. I had to know if he was still ok. It would make me feel even worse if he was feeling the same way as myself when I could so easily make it right. Making up my mind I hurried across my room to find something to wear for the walk over.

I grabbed a sweatshirt that was hanging from the back of my desk chair - it was one of Edward's that he must have forgotten. It was giant on me but I threw it on anyway. I was only wearing a tank top and flannel PJ pants - I didn't feel like getting hypothermia just yet. I felt my way across my dark floor until I came across my sneakers. I pulled them on, located my house key, then crept to my door.

Listening carefully for a full minute, I made sure I could hear nothing moving inside the house before I tiptoed out and down the stairs. I figured someone would recognize the distinctive sound of the front door being opened and closed so I choose a ground floor window to climb out through. I had to pick my way through a patch of Esme's rose bushes before I was free.

_I can't believe I'm actually doing this..._ A little voice in my head tried to talk me out my latest escapade, but the prospect of seeing Jasper overwhelmed my reasoning just a little. I kept in the darkest shadows of the trees as I made my way down our silent misty street. Of course I knew Jasper's address already - small town, everyone knew where everyone lived around here. I made it over without any problems.

I suppose I never really thought about if I was found out, and just how much I might have looked like a burglar. Luckily for me and my momentary total lack of judgement, no one saw me sneak around the back of the house and start peaking into each of the ground floor windows. I knew Jasper and Rosalie lived with relatives in Forks, I just didn't know who exactly. Hopefully not over possessive ones with a shot gun in the front closet for intruders...

All the ground floor windows were dark so I looked around for plan B. I saw there was an old wooden fire escape going up the back of the house so I scrambled up, nearly tripping only once. Two big bay windows faced over the back yard, one still had a light on. I decided to try that one first. It turned out to be a good choice. Jasper was sitting in an armchair next to the window with earphones on and his eyes closed. The only light came from a small desk lamp under the window. The curtains were half drawn back, allowing me a good view of his expression before he became aware of my presence. His eyes were closed tightly and his breathing slow. One hand rested lightly against his temple as if he was concentrating hard on the song he was listening to.

Then my head knocked into the window with a thump that surprised even me - I had been unconsciously leaning forward to look at him and had forgotten the glass barrier still separating us. Oops. Jasper's eyes snapped open and he sat up sharply before wincing and pausing to brace his injured shoulder with one hand.

He finally caught sight of my face in the dim light outside his half closed curtains. He stared frozen and wordless for a few seconds, looking somewhat astonished. Then he jumped to his feet - as well as he could with a cast on his broken leg that is. Putting all his weight on one side, he scrambled over to the desk and leaned across to open the window and let me in.

'Alice?' He sounded disbelieving when I poked my head in through the now open window with a huge grin on my face, 'What on earth are you doing here?'

'Coming to see you of course, silly. What did you think? Me and Rose had a slumber party planned or something?'

'Entirely plausible circumstances...' he teased. He ran a hand through his ruffled hair, still looking a little bewildered. 'Well?' I asked, 'Can I come in?'

'Uh, sure. Of course. Here-' He offered me a hand so I could climb in onto his desk under the window. I closed the window and curtains behind me then jumped down. Jasper was over at the door, closing it gently. 'My aunt's a light sleeper and I'm not so sure she would have any pleasant reaction to finding girls sneaking in my window in the middle of the night...' He trailed off chuckling and raised a mischievous eyebrow at me.

I stuck my tongue out at him. 'Oh you know I'm only here to get you in trouble.'

'I should have known...' he said shaking his head with mock sadness, 'Guess I'm doomed now.' 'Oh very,' I grinned evilly and folded my arms smugly.

It was then that I became acutely aware that neither of us said anything next. It was dead silent as we both stared at each other from opposite sides of the tiny room. The silence lasted just long enough for me to remember why I had come here in the first place - the intensity of the pain I was sure we had both been feeling before I had come tumbling in the window a few minutes ago.

The next moment I was across the room in Jasper's arms. I don't remember walking over. All I could think about was the arms wrapped tightly around me, Jasper's lips at my ear whispering how much he had missed me and how I could have been perfectly happy to never move from exactly where I was ever again.

Suddenly the ground disappeared beneath my feet and I realised Jasper had scooped me up in his arms. He carried me over to the armchair he had been seated in earlier and sat down again, this time with me curled up against his chest. I looped one arm around his neck, the other rested on his heart. I leaned back my head enough to kiss him gently, then I couldn't help giggling. 'I really did miss you, you know?' I whispered through my smile.

He laughed softly. 'Well I'd be the last to know. It hardly shows...' he teased me. I reached up one hand to muss his hair in return. He ducked his head to try and avoid it which actually worked in his favour because this brought his face closer to mine which distracted me thoroughly. 'I still can't believe you're really here,' he whispered, his eyes smoldering even in the low light. Then he leaned in to kiss me again and everything instantly flew out of my mind except the feel of his lips. This is what I had been missing so sharply. I never wanted to leave.

* * * *

A beam of blinding sunlight cut through the gap in the curtains and cut across my face. I blinked open one eye then the other, trying to get my bearings. I raised my head very slightly and remembered in an instant where I was. My tiny form was still curled up in Jasper's arms, my head tucked into his shoulder. He was still asleep and his chin rested on the top of my head. I could feel his every breath against my neck. I shifted slightly to stretch out my legs and then settled back down hoping I wouldn't wake him yet. It couldn't be more than five or six in the morning and the house was silent. If I didn't have to leave quite yet, there was no way I was going anywhere.

Later in the morning proved entertaining as I had to sneak back out of Jasper's window and down the fire escape. I snuck back through the kitchen window and back upstairs only to find Edward leaning against my door, arms folded and with half a smirk on his face. The other half of his expression was very much annoyed. He knew who I had been with.

'Oh come on,' I muttered as I crossed the room to throw my sweatshirt onto my bed, 'Aren't you at least a little bit proud of me?' We always complimented each other on carrying out dares that would get us into trouble with our parents. His glare said an obvious no. I shrugged and kept on doing what I was doing, humming all the while. His bad mood couldn't mare my warm-n-fuzzy happy glow. Something that added to my happiness was that the visions had not made an appearance in over two weeks. Whatever strange glitch had gone wrong in my brain had somehow been fixed by the trauma of the accident...maybe it had just knocked a few wires back into place, who knew. But so long as my mind was back under my own control, I had nothing to complain about.


	13. Chapter 13

**Credit for the lyrics in this chapter go to the Goo Goo Dolls (except for the ones so obviously written by me :P) I also highly recommend listening to the actual song at the end of this chapter because it is truly amazing - it's called Always Know Where You Are.  
**

**Chapter 13:**

The next day was a return to school (oh joy) and thus normal routine again. Normal besides the fact that Jasper and I were currently the source of eternal gossip. Great. Both of us actually ended up skipping our last period classes to meet up outside on the front steps of the school. We sat together without talking for a while, waiting for the last remaining students to disappear. Jasper started the conversation off. 'So...you remember everything I said back in the diner? Before the accident?'

I nodded. 'Sure do.'

'And you're answer is still?...' he trailed off.

'The same,' I answered with grin. 'Are you sure that's what you really want?' he asked warily.

'I'm positive, so don't even _think_ about trying to talk me out of it. It's not going to work.'

Jasper shook his head and laughed. 'Still just as stubborn as even to get what you want. Not even near death experiences came change your heart apparently.'

'No. Though not that I want to make a habit of them. One was quite enough for now, thank you'

'But you're judging near death by your standards. I trip to the mall with you might fall under the same category for others...'

I reached over to playfully smack him. He nudged me back then wrapped his arm around my shoulders and pulling me close. 'I don't know quite how to say how happy I am about your choice. I'm so happy when I'm around you, it's like my past never happened. Then when you walk away and I feel like it's the day after all over again...' 'Hey, well then I have an idea. How about I don't ever leave? Think that would work, Jazz?'

He gave me a bemused look. 'No one's ever called me that before. ...It sounds nice.' 'Good cause you're going to hear a lot more of it!' I jumped up and danced up the stairs, a teasing grin on my face. He watched me with amusement until I climbed up onto the stone banister that ran down either side of the front steps. It was a bit of an acrobatic stunt to get to the top - it was nearly half my height. I stood up and carefully placed one foot in front of the other with my arms held out on either side, laughing at my poor impression of a ballerina. Jasper got up and went over to me, looking a little bit nervous.

'Alice, please come down?' He reached out towards me but I refused to take his hand, still giggling, 'Why?'

'You could slip and hurt yourself or-' 'Or I could do this!' I proclaimed, giving him just enough time to process my movements before I took a flying leap off the stone wall at him, forcing him to catch me. My tiny form definitely wasn't enough to unbalance him in anyway, so he kept his arms wrapped around me and escorted me to the bottom of the steps where he set me down.

He drew a deep breath and shook his head, still a little shocked. 'You are...' 'Insane?' I filled in for him cheerfully. Behind us the bell ran, signally the end of class for the day. 'Yes. Exactly.' 'Oh come on, you know you love it.' 'Well, I definitely can't argue with that,' he shrugged with a mischievous grin and bent down to kiss me, right there as students began pouring out the front doors behind us. I heard a few wolf whistles and a particularly loud call of 'Way to score, Jasper!', which I knew for a fact was Emmett, but I really didn't care...

* * * *

'Hey guys, I have an announcement,' I said dancing in step between the guys as we all walked through the doors of the caf. We had turned into the couple-y group that sat together at lunch, what with me and Jasper, Rose and Emmett and my brother and Bella. 'What? That you and Jasper were caught making out in the back of class again?' snickered Emmett, poking me in the ribs. I dodged it and smacked him playfully, 'Sorry, that's just you and Rose.'

Emmett gave me a look of mock horror while Jasper laughed and Edward just rolled his eyes. Although he and Jasper were now finally back on the same friendly terms as they had been before the accident, Edward was still slightly distant. I couldn't change his mind entirely it seemed and until time convinced him, he was still a little wary of accepting my official boyfriend. Too bad for him because there was no way I was letting Jasper go anywhere anytime soon.

'No, that's not at all what I was going to say and if _someone_ didn't keep interrupting me with childish remarks, I would tell you that it's the school talent show this Friday! And it's going to be great!'

'Are you part of it?' Jasper asked.

'Yes. And so are you.'

Jasper blinked. 'Um...what?'

'You heard me, you're going to be part of it too!' I gloated at the look of surprise/horror on his face and the look of glee on Emmett's.

'Why?' Jasper asked nervously, 'And since when?'

'Because I said so. And since I decided yesterday evening.'

'I guess that's...cool. Ok, what do you want me to do then?'

'Just make use of your awesome musical talent and flaunt to the school how truly amazing my boyfriend is? What else?' I smiled innocently.

'Oh boy...um, ok I'll do my best?'

'Yay!' I clapped and jumped up and down on the spot in the caf line up until Edward stopped me in case I hurt someone walking by.

Chapter 14:

The talent show, which was held in the school's auditorium, was pretty damn epic overall. Me, Bella, Jessica, Angela and a slightly reluctant Rosalie pulled off an air band performance of a Spice Girl's song, reliving our pre-teen days. Then several other groups of students and even a few teachers carried out songs and skits. Then finally as the last act of the evening, Jasper came on stage and sat down in front of the mike. He had his acoustic guitar and a wide grin. That smile alone worried me slightly. I had attempted to give him just enough time to get an act together without any retaliation plotting, but something about that smile told me I was in for mor than I had bargained for...

'Hello everybody,' Jasper's quiet musical voice came out of the speakers. 'Well I wasn't originally planning on being part of this show, but then someone absolutely insisted about, oh 24 hours ago that I should. I really didn't have a choice in the matter, she's quite diabolical when she feels like it. So I figured that if I have to suffer through this, so must she. And if you don't already know who I'm talking about, you'll figure it out soon enough...' His eyes locked with mine for moment and I could see he was enjoying himself watching my confused expression. 'Okay squirt, this is for you,' he said, adding, 'This is just something I scribbled down last night seeing as that's pretty much all the time I had to prepare anyway.'

I had to smile - I_ had _kind of left it last minute to tell him he was in the show or else. _Wait, did he just say he wrote something? What?_I couldn't look away. Everyone was looking at him expectantly, a few people also looking at me curiously. Everything was silent for a moment, then a light tune started up.

'_You bewitched me with your pop dance moves,_

_always hyper and in the groove._

_Terrified Mike with every word you say,_

_gotta admit, it made my day.'_

Wait, was this what I thought it was?...

'_Purple hair and infinite energy,_

_a wild ride is a guarantee.'_

Oh my god. NO WAY! No freaking way he was singing about me... I was torn between wanting to crack up entirely and be almost embarrassed.

'_When I'm with you I'm never sure_

_if you are under the influence of...liqueur.'_

He said the last part hesitantly and grimaced slightly at the lack of good rhyming. Some people giggled and there was no doubt as to who he was talking about now. I didn't really care, I still loved it. It was the best thing that someone had ever done for me. I had to bite my lip to stop from bursting out laughing it was just so ridiculous. I ducked my head to hide my probably bright red cheeks. He kept on singing.

'_Up for any challenge, with that_

_innocent smile of unknown intent._

_Time with her is always well spent.'_

'_Oh yes, always up for any challenge, with that_

_innocent smile of unknown intent._

_Time with her is always well spent...'_

The crowd burst into applause and laughter.

'Okay that was just for kicks. As much as she probably wants to kill me now, I honestly couldn't resist. My next number is another acoustic and hopefully slightly more musically oriented. Sadly it was not written by me, although I wish it had been.' He adjusted the mike and cleared his throat. 'Alice, this is for you.' A few wolf whistles came from the crowd and I just couldn't stop smiling.

'_It's good to see the sun_

_And feel this place_

_This place I never thought would feel like home_

_And I ran forever_

_Far away and I_

_I always thought I'd end up here alone_

_Somehow_

_The world has changed and_

_I've come home_

_To give you back the things they took from you_

_And I feel you now_

_I'm not alone I'll_

_Always know where you are_

_When I see myself I'll always_

_Know where you are_

_Where you are_

_And I found something_

_That was always there_

_Sometimes it's got to hurt before you feel_

_But now I'm strong and_

_I won't kneel_

_Except to thank who's watching over me_

_Somehow_

_I feel so strong and I've begun_

_To be the one I never thought I'd be_

_And I feel you now_

_I'm not alone I'll_

_Always know where you are_

_When I see myself I'll_

_Always know where you are_

_Where you are_

_Now, it's all so clear and_

_I believe_

_That everything's been opened up to me_

_And I feel you now_

_I'm not alone_

_I always know_

_I always know where you are_

_When I see myself I'll_

_Always know where you are_

_When I feel the sun I'll_

_Always know where you are_

_When I see myself I'll_

_Always know where you are_

_Where you are...'_

I was in no doubt that I would always know where my heart was.

**The End **

**Finally...haha Wow it's taken me six months to finish this story. A huge thank you to everyone whose read, reviewed and waited for me! **

**xoxo Lady Orion **


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